How can an escort be successful and completely avoid the hobbyists and their review system? I usually attract the gentlemanly type who won’t kiss and tell, and after my first few interactions with hobbyists, I’m utterly shocked by their entitlement and crude behavior. Since Eros and Slixa do authentication (so clients can be reasonably sure I’m real), is there any point to an escort putting up with hobbyist garbage?
Most clients will respect a lady’s request not to be reviewed, and that is reinforced with time because an escort without reviews will tend to be avoided by the sort of men who are most invested in the review culture. The best clients know that a large fraction of reviews are bullshit anyway, and will judge for themselves based on an escort’s website, the length of time she’s been around, and perhaps even non-review conversations on the boards. As you correctly point out, there are other means of authentication, and if you’ve made it up until now without allowing reviews I don’t think there’s a need to start. One thing you might do is get to know a few of the other escorts in your area who don’t allow reviews; a good reference from one of them would help you to know that a gentleman can be trusted to be gentlemanly.
I am just beginning in the escort industry and trying to find out which are the best agencies to work for in my area. Also, do you know what agencies would be looking for as far as interviewing – things to be sure to mention or avoid, dress, etc?
Though working for a reputable agency used to be a good deal, it has become much less so now that the internet makes self-advertising so easy. And remember, this is advice from a former escort service owner! Take a look at the “Mentoring” section of “Previously Asked Questions” and read the linked entries; it may help you to make up your mind, and most of the advice there will be useful no matter which route you take. In the interest of providing a complete answer, though, I asked a friend who lives in your area if there were any good agencies, and here is what she wrote:
I would dissuade her from working for an agency. Besides the cost factor, clients seem to be shifting away from agencies; they are also becoming more and more targets of LE due to the “trafficking” hysteria (remember, to target an escort service police must arrest the escorts first). I would tell any woman entering the business to consider finding a mentor, and working independently; it just seems to me to be safer at the present time.
What she said about client shifts and cop targeting is dead on; since agency owners can be branded “pimps” and “traffickers”, they attract a lot of attention these days from cops looking for heads to mount on the wall. Though working independently is by no means safe from cop depredation, it may indeed be safer than working for an agency (especially if you’ve got a friend who will check you in and out).
If, however, you still prefer to work for an agency, interviewing is really not all that different from what you’d do for any other job interview: dress nicely but not fancily, be friendly, answer the interviewer’s questions honestly and be prepared to provide whatever information they need; you’ll probably be asked to sign a disclaimer. I preferred to weed my applicants on the phone and in the interview, but it may be that they’re using online forms nowadays. If you’re attractive and present yourself well, it shouldn’t be difficult to get them to take you on; the real test comes later, because just like any company they’re going to rely most heavily on employees who are dependable and make the company the most money (in this case, by high customer satisfaction). Girls who are easy to contact, professional and make the clients happy will get the most calls; those who are the opposite will find their phones ringing less and less.
(Have a question of your own? Please consult this page to see if I’ve answered it in a previous column, and if not just click here to ask me via email.)
“Entitlement and crude behaviour”, I so hear that.
I get a similar type of person hassling me on swinging sites. Their logic seems to be, “She’s a single female on a swinging site, she’s clearly ‘up for it’ with anyone, she will definitely have sex with me, at my convenience.’
The messages I get are unbelievable! Guys don’t read a word of my profile, you just get a one-liner like, ‘I’m free this afternoon, fancy a pounding?’ ‘Want to go for a drive tonight?’ or ‘I’m in the area overnight, come and see me in my hotel.’
I’ve written a short, but really specific profile detailing what I’m about, so I don’t waste people’s time, and sleazy dudes just completely ignore it… it’s all about them!
All single women on such sites get similar treatment – and the guys wonder why they keep getting blocked…! Tragic.
Have blogged some of the sleazy come-ons here if anyone fancies a cringey read… http://wp.me/p4gIAl-9s
Okay … I have SOME experience using “seeking arrangements” (about a month) – which isn’t for swingers necessarily but I’d say it’s roughly the same experience.
If you want to use those sites – I would recommend YOU contact the guys who’s profiles you find interesting. It’s a sea of “freaks” out there and maybe a few serious, gentlemanly kind of guys. You can spot them by reading their profiles usually. I took a lot of time writing my profile and “encoded”, quite obviously – what I was looking for. I was NOT looking for a long-term arrangement – basically I was looking for a girl who was willing to do exactly what an escort does – under the same terms. I also posted some tasteful pics so the girls would know I wasn’t an ogre. I was looking for a Non-professional escort. Don’t judge me – but if the risk of getting discovered weren’t so great when using those sites – I’d still be doing it. I had a VERY, VERY good experience with one girl – the first one I “picked”. Girls really don’t have to “entertain” me or be highly skilled to thrill me. In fact, I rather like the girls with a “normal” skillset – because it’s more of a “real” experience with me. The girl I saw also genuinely “got into” the experience like no escort I’ve ever been with has.
I had many girls contact me and believe me – they can be as bad as the freakiest guys out there. I just read the profiles of the ones who contacted me and narrowed it down to two college students. One, after communicating with her – was very “entitlement” oriented – so I passed. The other, I met her for lunch just to check her out first (yes, I paid her for lunch) … and then we scheduled a date. I haven’t seen her since even though it was AWEsome … and she only occasionally emails me to see what I’m up to. I deleted that profile though – because those sites are fraught with peril.
But I think the best way to make these sites work for you is to do EXACTLY opposite what you’d do in real life – where you expect the guy to make the advance. On these sites – I think it works out a whole lot better for the girl to make the advance on the guy’s who profiles she finds interesting.
Hiya, it’s really interesting reading a guy’s perspective on all this. I’ve actually tried contacting guys on these kinds of sites too and they’re always happy to chat, but the minute I suggest meeting up for a coffee or a quick drink just to say hello, they seem to disappear into thin air!
You’re right about the women too – single girls who contact me are, without exception, terrifying!
There is another category of guy, though, who is perfectly nice and normal, but we can never get the timings right to meet up because of their work commitments and distance we live from each other etc.
I just wish it was the crazy people who had the logistics problems and the polite ones who didn’t – would make life a lot easier.
Another problem is that I live in a small backwoods kind of place so there are fewer people to “choose” from [pardon the word ‘choose’ can’t think of a better one…!
From time to time I work in a big city, and I’ve had a very nice time with some of the men who’ve contacted me while I’m in a metropolis. Even if they’ve not been on that type of site very long, city boys in the UK seem to have a much better Idea of how to go about things. Ie, all the ‘not rocket science’ stuff like being polite and not demanding explicit pictures and stuff. SO it’s not all bad – I just blog the crazy stuff!
What kind of behavior specifically is she talking about. She complains about the review system – then says this … so I’m assuming they are writing something “crude” in the reviews?
I HAVE written reviews – but here is my policy. I always ask the girl if she wants a review first. If she says “yes” – I’ll write one. I have had several specifically ask me to write a review for them because they were “new” and didn’t have reviews.
I NEVER write a bad review. If I had a “so-so” time – then I just won’t write any review at all. You can bank on the fact that, when you see one of my reviews – the girl rocked my world. If she didn’t – I wouldn’t have written anything. You simply would not have known if I even saw her.
I NEVER make negative comments about a girl’s body. I think women are sensitive to comments that say … “well she had a “mommy tummy” or “saggy boobs” … stuff like that. I don’t think it’s correct to really talk about women as if they were livestock – but I have commented on good stuff like … “her ass is incredible”.
So, essentially my policy is to say something nice – or don’t say anything at all. One girl I saw was new … and she practically begged for a review. Well, the problem was – her “nether regions” smelled like four-day-old armadillo carcass roadkill. Now – I am a guy that GOES CRAZY (literally out of control CRAZY) over female odors and this is my number one problem with escorts – they are usually all freshly cleaned – so I don’t get the enjoyment I normally do like I would a girl who washed in the morning – or last night. However, THIS GIRL’s odors WERE BEYOND THE PALE. My nose was burning! I lost my ability to perform it was so bad. However, I just took a step back and said … “Krulac, you’re supposed to like that shit – so saddle up even though this is a lot more than we normally bargain for.” She was terrific actually … I had to keep moving her around the room to get away from the smell but she was so submissive – like a little kitten really – that I’d see her again. She made feel like Conan. I WROTE her a review – because she had ONE review from a doofus. I didn’t mention the smell in the review but I did take her aside later and mention it to her very “delicately”. She took it well and when she read my review … SHE WAS ECSTATIC.
Usually escort review sites will have a more detailed section of each girl’s reviews that contains more “specific” information on the date – the dirty details, etc. This is wanking material mostly. And (giggle) yes, I have written that stuff too because it’s fun to write. Also – if the girl is trying to get business – I will write that section to where it sets any man on FIRE when he reads it. Even still – there’s not the slightest negative or mediocre comment that I write in that section. I also won’t brag about my own sexual “prowess” in that section (even though, let’s face it – it is LEGEND LOLOLOL ). The review’s not about me. Essentially I try to write something sexy that captures the girl’s personality. If the girl has a very submissive personality (and most of them I see do) – then I try to capture that in the writing. If the girl is PSE – likewise. I’m not into PSE but I got hoodwinked into seeing a girl like that because she had a smoking hot body. I wrote her a great review because she pretty much did everything correctly and it was only my own preferences that kind of spoiled my enjoyment. PSE’s can sometimes be aggressive, or they appear that way to me … and sexually aggressive women turn me OFF. Still – I know some guys like that shit so I gave her a very good review without the slightest hint that I really didn’t get much out of it.
I agree with your policy. write reviews for those who and reviews and are good.Don’t write reviews where the service was not good.
In the UK the major escorting site has two levels of reviewing. Thenormsl full review describing everything and the one liner feed back review.
The feed back is only active when the booking is made through the site, the feedback is a one liner and is two way. The escort leaves feed back on the client and the client on the escort. Now many escorts using that site will not see a client who does not have positive feedback. Often the feed back is simply ‘arrived on time’, ‘was a good client’
“…my own sexual “prowess”…. is LEGEND…”
Oh, really? 😉
You know what they say about us “supersized”, er – I mean circumcized guys! 😀
Didn’t it ever strike you that you’d missed your vocation? I mean, with such a record, surely there’d have been a place in California/Miami for you? 😉
Are you talking about being a “gigalo”? LOL – I would SUCK at that! I’m waaaay too “uncivilized” to get chicks to pay me for my company. Example – the other day a lady from another business walked into the bar and asked to borrow a wine glass. I said, “sure” – and went to the bartender to ask for one.
“Hey, gimme a wine glass – Lisa from next door wants it.”
He nods his head and says … “White or Red?”
Well … the music is LOUD … and I’m thinking … “bastard didn’t hear me correctly.”
“NO … I NEED A WINE GLASS … WINE GLASS!!”
“Yeah, WHITE or RED?” he says.
Now I’m thinking he thinks I want the wine glass to be filled with wine – I don’t, I just want the glass.
“NO! READ MY LIPS – I JUST NEED THE FUCKIN’ GLASS!”
“NO SHIT … BUT DO YOU WANT A WHITE OR A RED WINE GLASS?”
I still don’t get this. We have COLORED glasses? So I’m figuring … well, maybe he’s counting a CLEAR WINE GLASS as being a WHITE one. I definitely don’t think Lisa wants a glass colored RED – so I say … “A WHITE ONE!!”
And he gives me a clear glass and I take it to Lisa …
“No I need a RED wine glass!”, Lisa says.
WTF!!! People!!! So I go back and tell the bartender … “No, she wants a RED one!”
He brings me another CLEAR glass … only this one is shorter than the other.
“DAMMIT – I SAID RED!!”
And he looks at it and says … “Yeah – that’s a FUCKING RED WINE GLASS.”
“No it’s not … it’s absolutely clear.” Now I’m just confused as fuck – he can see right. I hold the glass up to my and try to look at him through it.
That’s when a female bartender comes over … clearly a girl who’s had an ape for a boyfriend at some time in her life and knows how to speak “gorilla”.
“Krulac – you know there are two different kinds of wine – RED and WHITE. You don’t serve them in the same glass. THIS glass – is for RED WINE.”
And I say … “Seriously? You serve them in different glasses? Shit I’m 52 and I’m just now learning this?”
So no, I have all the “culture” of an offshore oil rigger! LOL No “gigalo’ing” for me!!
Ah, the perils of English grammar and punctuation; A red wine glass; a red-wine glass; a red, wine glass…
But no, I wasn’t thinking of this as a career. More performing in the visual arts, on camera, and getting paid for it. I can see the titles already: “krulac and the 72 virgins”… 😉
Nope there’s two promises I have kept to my mother. The first was … “never get a tattoo” and the other was … “don’t ever do porn”.
I’m certain I would suck at it anyway. Can you imagine John Wayne doing porn? Yah … me neither and that’s what it would be like!!
I don’t like writing reviews, but around here they are relied on by both the ladies and the gentlemen. I find myself avoiding new ladies with few reviews all from new guys. There is too much LE activity in our area.
Nonetheless, I only write reviews when I am asked to do so. And I always try to be a gentleman. When I was just getting started, I spent time with one respected escort who said she didn’t care for reviews but explained the advantages to me if I wrote one. She gave me permission to write a review so I could start getting established. I never wrote the review. But others have needed the reviews to build their business and I have provided those.
The reviews are also beneficial to the women who screen new clients.
My ATF won’t see certain clients if she doesn’t like what’s in the reviews he’s written. A guy who has a propensity to write negative reviews – or a lot of negativity in his reviews – she won’t see him. If she can see in the review that the guy’s “thing” is to be dominated – she won’t see him since she doesn’t do anything remotely close to domination – unless it’s dominating another woman (and then she insists). She won’t see a guy who has reviewed a transsexual or other “male” escort – that’s just her preference I suppose but male homosexuality turns her off (so does female homosexuality – she “fakes” interaction with a girl when a client asks for it – though she’ll allow girls to perform oral on her).
You can get a lot of information on a client from the reviews he writes and the girls he sees.
Overall I like the review system as most of the the gentlemen that have reviewed Amy have been fair. I do not like the fact that an escort cannot leave a reply to a review but thAt is the way it is. That is way screening is important which is what I do for Amy.
Amy has gotten a couple of reviews that were much lower than her average which is about 8.3. In those cases it was easy to see that there was something wrong with the client as I recall so they had very little effect on on our business.
As for scoring a ladies looks beauty is in the eye of the beholder. In my eyes Amy has always been a 9 but she constantly gets reviews ranging from 7 to 10 averaging an 8. What I thank is more useful to the customer / hobbyist is weather a girl’s photos are accurate.
Amy operates in the higher dollar range so most of the men she dates are gentlemen overall. She has some that she has become very good friends with over the years. I have even become friends with a couple of her clients myself which is interesting.
Sam
Excellent advice. I love that you request to not be reviewed. Such a nice touch of class. I completely appreciate the safety value in that as well.
One question…how do you check in or check out with someone to let them know you are safely there and safely gone? Buddy system? Do you find that reliable? What’s your back up plan if your buddy fails to follow up if you don’t report in? I guess that’s more than one question. But safety is my #1 concern.
Screening is the number one key to safety for any escort and especially an independent escort. If you know their address, real name, phone number, and employment then you will be safe 99% of the time. A safe call is added security. In Amy’s case I am it and I am usually just down the road in some parking lot screening some future client or surfing the net to kill time. You should have a safe call you can trust to take the correct action if something should go wrong. It has to be someone who understands this business and has your interests at heart.
Since Amy doesn’t wear a watch I generally call her and let it ring twice 5 minutes before the date is scheduled to conclude. Then give her 15 minutes to call me back. If I don’t her from then I call her phone and let it ring till she picks up. If still now answer then I call the client which on the few occasions I’ve had to do that they were quite surprised that I had their number. Things have never had to progress pass that point in our case and there was some innocent reason why she didn’t answer when I called. She already understands how I will proceed if I don’t hear from her so she always calls me if the date has been extended or she is running behind for some reason.
The clients know she has a driver from her reviews and I imagine that in itself weeds out much of the wheat from the chaff. When I say driver I don’t mean pimp. I am her minor partner but in the end she is my boss though we work so well together like a right and left hand.
Sam, the articles maggie links to seem to indicate that, thanks to the runaway legislation that has been engineered around “trafficking conflation” you could be basically arrested as “exploiter” despite the true nature of your role.
Are you able to tell us how you’ve managed to avoid this?