Archive for November 17th, 2010

Fifth floor!  Rubber tires, sugar, bourbon, butter, and other picture postcards! –  Bugs Bunny, from Hare Conditioned (1945)

Another collection of short, tenuously-related articles.

The Camel’s Nose

In my above-titled column of October 2nd, I discussed a congressional plot to rush through legislation which would give Congress and federal judges both broad powers to censor the internet.  The conspiracy to sneak this law past the American people in ten days was foiled, but its sponsors haven’t given up by any means; as I pointed out in Saturday’s column oppressive regimes hate the internet and are always seeking new ways to censor it.  This recent article from Huffington Post discusses the efforts to oppose the power elite’s newest strategy in its ongoing efforts to turn the United States into a police state like most of the others where prostitution is still illegal.

Pay No Attention To That Man Behind the Curtain!

While the FBI spends hundreds of millions of dollars to harass prostitutes under the smoke screen of “rescuing missing children”, the government has purposefully hidden data which could find many of them, namely the records of the Internal Revenue Service.  The IRS claims its refusal to release these records is because of “privacy restrictions”, which is a bit like a rapist trying to explain his actions as a defense of feminine chastity.  Obviously, we can’t have the IRS publicly admitting that roughly 95% of “missing” children are actually living with the parent they prefer rather than the one to whom a clueless judge assigned custody; not only would that ruin a good moral panic and the excuse for the government’s anti-whore campaign, it would also force the authorities to find another bogeyman with which to frighten the sheeple into accepting ever-increasing surveillance and restrictions on civil liberties.

What If They Threw a Party and Nobody Came?

In my columns of September 2nd and October  26th I talked about Gardasil, the vaccine against the human papillomavirus.  Well, according to this recent Huffington Post article, more than 70% of the girls who are most at risk for venereal warts are either not getting the shot or else failing to show up for the two boosters.  The article suggests several possible reasons, including our society’s preference for treating symptoms over preventative measures and the excessive cost of the injections ($200 each where I live).  The author also suggests a “misguided distrust of all vaccines,” which despite her medical credentials I would have to disagree with considering the annual clamor for unnecessary “flu shots” among the perfectly healthy and the proliferation of antibacterial everything.  No, I think her last guess is the best one:

Or perhaps it’s our prudish mores, which don’t approve of vaccines that protects us from sexually transmitted infections.  Some groups feel it might in some way be sending the wrong message to young girls.  Certainly no one in the medical community is advocating sexually [sic] promiscuity for young women, nor trying to send the message that safe sex is no longer needed once you are vaccinated.  We are also continuing to advocate pap smears exams for women at the age of 21 or for those who are sexually active.

I’d be willing to bet a substantial sum on that being the real reason, no matter what the reader comments to the original article claim.  If there were a vaccine for HIV or hepatitis people might get it because those diseases can also be spread by blood, but if there were one for herpes, syphilis, gonorrhea or even chlamydia I’m sure it would be just as unpopular as this one.  And the reason for that is the same reason that the rate of venereal disease is vastly higher among university students than it is among streetwalkers:  The bizarre but popular delusion, encouraged by cops and religious fundamentalists, that only “bad girls” take precautions against venereal diseases.

Weird Search Terms

Among the many interesting blog statistics available to WordPress users is a daily summary of terms with which people found one’s site through search engines.  Most of these are unsurprising; the most common ones by far for this blog are various permutations of “maggie mcneill”, “the honest courtesan” or some combination of the two, followed by “siemiradzki” and “henryk siemiradzki”; Siemiradzki was the 19th-century Polish artist who painted  “Phryne at the Festival of Eleusin”, a segment of which adorns my column on Phryne.  Apparently there aren’t many of his pictures online, because in a Google image search of his name that column shows up on the first page, which results in it actually being the specific column with the second-most hits (after Whores in the News).

But among all the obvious or at least understandable searches there are a few which are just…weird.  One of these, “types of hound dogs” wouldn’t be weird in and of itself…but how in the world did it lead the searcher here?  And another, “the old honest courtesan”, is the opposite; it’s obvious how it led him here, but what does it really mean?  As for the rest…well, you be the judge; these are reproduced exactly as they appeared in my statistics:

the badge of harlotry
escorts that casterate
lord of war coke line
“she cuts” “foreskin”
vagina preaching

Then, just the other day, someone found this column with the search “facts about the heffalump”; I certainly hope the searcher realized that heffalumps were the undescribed products of A.A. Milne’s imagination.

For Those Who Think Dating is Safer Than Whoring…

The following is paraphrased from an Associated Press release; I can’t say I’ve ever heard of anything quite like it, but murderous rage after being jilted really isn’t anything new:

A Los Angeles man was arrested Friday (November 12th) and charged with trying to run down his ex-girlfriend with his car after she refused his wedding proposal at the Burger Stop.  After the woman said no, 22-year-old Francisco Hernandez allegedly drove onto the sidewalk, through bushes and into the restaurant parking lot, narrowly missing her; “Stacy Will You Marry Me” was written on the car’s back window.  Hernandez then fled on foot and was later arrested after cops spotted him walking down the street with a bouquet of flowers.  Sheriff’s Lt. Andrew Berg says Hernandez was charged with assault with a deadly weapon.

I’m not clear on why he left the car, nor if he fled with the flowers or bought them for an apology attempt in the time between the attack and his arrest.  I wonder what the card said; “Please forgive me from trying to murder you?”  Luckily for the lady, she must have lacked my appreciation for the absurdity of his initial actions; if a 22-year-old boy had proposed to me in  the parking lot of a burger joint, I think I would’ve been too doubled over with laughter to avoid the car.  Also, if the girl had been a whore and he had tried to run her down for refusing his offer of $50 for six hours of nonstop sex, the cops would’ve ignored it and the prohibitionists would be using it as an example of why prostitution was too dangerous to allow.

…And Always Know Where Your Towel Is

While browsing the TCAA site I discovered this link to SWOP’s suggestion for every hooker to develop a “Don’t Panic” plan she can give to friends in case she is arrested.  The idea is that if a woman knows her kids, pets, house, etc are being taken care of while she is delayed for hours after the arrest, she is less likely to panic and let the cops take advantage of her.  Our having procedures like this in place helped me to stay calm after my arrest and got me out of the clutches of the cops within half an hour of their finally allowing me my one phone call.  Some of the suggestions in the document are specific to San Francisco or presume that one will fight the charge rather than just settling it, but the rest is very worth thinking about.  A good agency will take care of all this, but many agencies aren’t good and many girls work alone; such an unprotected girl needs someone (who can be counted on to answer the phone while she’s working) to know where she is, what she’s doing and what to do in an emergency.

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