I dazedly chose or hired the companionship of unsavory and insipid types. Regardless of their saltless reputations, I always led with condoms and honesty when it came to my condition. – Charlie Sheen
By now you’ve probably all heard that Charlie Sheen is HIV positive, and that in his Today show appearance he basically blamed it on sex workers. He also claims to have “led with condoms” and denies any IV drug use. Now, I’ve never seen Mr. Sheen professionally, but as it turns out I know someone who did in ’07. This is her story, exactly as she told it to me yesterday; I have not changed a single word except to correct a few minor typos. As you will see, it disagrees with two points of his denial of risky behavior; I have heard rumors of another, even riskier behavior, but unless someone is willing to write a firsthand account of that one I am not at liberty to mention it. Normally, accounts like this one are outside my ethical bounds, but I’m not going to sit idly by while my sisters are blamed for something that they had nothing to do with.
“He’s a major player. Don’t screw this up.”
That was the injunction issued to me by the booker of my agency in Los Angeles. Curiosity piqued, I touched up my lipstick and ran down the stairs to get in my driver’s car. The first words out of his mouth were, “Don’t you have anything more…revealing?”
Exasperated, I replied, “I can’t even sit down in this dress without starting a riot. What do you want me to wear, a Band Aid?” My driver informed me that this particular client was a known connoisseur of adult performers, and my chic little black dress was a bit too conservative for his liking. I asked why he called our agency in the first place; we were a well respected escort service with a strict “no adult performers” policy.
“He’s used us before. He’s got money to burn and he’ll take good care of you. Just don’t be…yourself.” My driver soared up the Sherman Oaks side of the Hollywood Hills. We turned into the Mulholland Estates and the guard cheerfully waved us through the gate. I groaned, since I never had much luck in this neighborhood. Something always seemed to go wrong. A couple of muscular gentleman came to the car and told my driver he couldn’t stay. My driver clearly expected this, patted me on the head and told me to go make money.
Heart sinking, I walked to the garage with the security guards. They checked my purse for a weapon. After I passed that, one of them asked me if I knew who I was going to be seeing. I replied that this wasn’t my first high profile client and certainly wouldn’t be my last. He looked at me and started laughing. I batted my lashes and laughed back. “Oh, he’ll like you. I’ll walk you up.” We started the long trek uphill to the house. The door opened and I heard a man yelling on the phone. The security guards told me to have fun, and walked out of the foyer. I heard a thud, as if something was thrown at the wall, and my client descended down the staircase…and his smile dissolved into one big question mark.
“Hi, I’m Charlie. Nice to meet you.” He stepped back and said “I expected you to be a little more…endowed?”
“My agency has a model quality guarantee. If you don’t like me, the cancellation fee is $150, and I’ll go. No hard feelings.”
I put my hands on my hips and turned to leave. “No wait. Please don’t go. I just didn’t expect someone so…conservative. You’re really pretty, I just like porn girls better.” I asked him if he was sure. He gave me a bear hug and said “Of course I’m sure, gorgeous. Let’s go upstairs.”
We walked upstairs into a small bedroom. I could tell by the smell someone had been smoking some form of narcotic. Porn was playing on one television,baseball on another. The smell was getting to me. He watched my nose twitch. “It’s crack, and I only do a few hits a night. I try to be a good boy when I’m working.” He asked me if I partied. I replied that it depended on what it was. He flashed his trademark grin and told me he had literally anything I desired. I politely asked if we could take care of business first. He turned and unlocked a drawer that had an astonishing amount of cash in it. The amount he gave me was basically enough to ensure I would be staying a while. He bragged that two well known adult stars had seen him last night. I knew one of them, and I asked why he hadn’t called them back tonight. “Cause I pay them to disappear, sweetheart. Now come over here and sit on my face.”
Things took a turn for the awkward a few minutes later when he requested bareback. I explained as delicately as I could that my agency didn’t allow that, and I personally preferred to use condoms as well. He took the news in stride, but it was clear the condoms were interfering with things. We proceeded to engage in other forms of contact. After he finished, it was clear he didn’t hold it against me. I cleaned him up, cleaned myself up, and I asked him what his call time was. “Early!” he laughed.
I asked him if he wanted me to leave, and he gripped my hand and said he really wanted me to stick around longer. I said that was just fine, and asked if I could party with him. He located my drug of choice on the table and asked if I smoked it,snorted it or shot it. I asked for a line. He said most girls he knew smoked it or shot it, and that his nose was so messed up that he had to smoke most of what he did. He also told me he had overdosed when he had mainlined years ago, so he only had needles around if someone he called over liked doing something that way. I asked him if he was scared of someone ODing in his bathroom. He said he had enough money to hush people up if they did.
His cellphone rang. “I’m sorry, sweetie. I’ll be right back after I take this call.” He went into the other room and I heard him in an argument with a very pissed off woman. He returned and it was clear he was agitated. “That woman is going to be the death of me.” I looked at him quizzically. “My girlfriend. She’s jealous of EVERYTHING. Even my kids.” I told him I was sorry about the drama. “This is why I like porn chicks. They don’t give a shit and they don’t wanna marry you. It’s just awesome sex and they’re off.”
By now, it was 2 AM. We dropped some Ecstasy, and he just wanted to hug me. And he would not shut up….it was irritating and endearing at the same time. He spoke of his love for women, and how he needed women as much as he needed alcohol, but his 12 step program at least helped him control the alcohol. That, and something called gabapentin. He droned on about how “nice girls” were just glorified whores, so dealing with actual whores was a pleasure by comparison. “The world is better off with girls like you. You’re an honest fuck. And you have a pretty pussy. Get out of this business while you can.”
I’m not sure if he knew what all he was saying. He was rich and famous and he had the luxury of not making sense. Behind the bravado, I saw a man who seemed genuinely terrified of being alone, yet also terrified of leaving his house. Although it was clear he was a volatile individual, he wasn’t necessarily the monster he has been made out to be. He complied with the rules of my agency, and we had a nice time. I do think at the time he considered himself indestructible. As I was leaving, he asked me if I knew any girls I could send him. He said all he needed was titties and a hole. I half jokingly told him I wasn’t doing my agency’s job for him. That made him laugh. “You are a very smart girl. Don’t ever change.”
I watched his descent into madness a couple years later, and it saddened me; that wasn’t the man I had seen in 2007. I do think the shock of his diagnosis sent him into a free fall. The first stage of grief is denial and I think he genuinely wanted to believe he was fine, and the people he kept company with would be fine as well. Unfortunately, I don’t think he had any idea of what potentially exposing the women in adult industries to HIV could mean for their careers. The current stigma against people in the sex industries means that if they contract HIV, they can’t do their jobs. And if they get caught by police while doing their jobs, they could be arrested under California’s draconian criminal transmission laws. A felony charge makes it really hard for a former sex worker or adult performer to find a straight job with insurance benefits. I think it behooves Mr. Sheen to pay for the testing of the sex workers he saw from 2011 to 2014 and if they do test positive, to set up a trust contributing for their medications.
Which brings us to the million dollar question: did Charlie Sheen maliciously expose dozens of sex workers to HIV? I honestly don’t think so. I doubt that he knew that the lambskin condoms he preferred can’t prevent HIV transmission. I also think the antiviral medications he is taking have lowered the virus to an almost undetectable level. As far as informing people of his status…I wouldn’t want to be a straight celeb saying they’re HIV positive for all the money in the world. People will sell anything to a tabloid. Although his allegedly not informing partners that he is HIV positive is wrong, if nobody so far has come up with HIV, how is this the public’s business? Selling pictures of his medication to the highest bidder was wrong. And if the person who did so had previously signed a nondisclosure agreement, it’s just as illegal as deliberately exposing someone to HIV.
As for the infamous open letter and the Today show interview…I don’t think writing it was his idea. His PR team is shitting bricks right now and knows this is the only real defense he will have if he is named as a defendant in any potential lawsuit in the future. He also has his children to think about. He could afford to be honest and testify for Heidi Fleiss in 1996, because he wasn’t in the middle of two separate child custody cases. Right now, he and his team are in damage control mode, so the spin doctors have to take advantage of the stigma against sex workers. Otherwise their client would be forced to take responsibility for his own actions, which in Hollywood carries even more stigma than sex work does.
That “apology” was a narcissistic a self-congratulatory screed from one who has no gumption for personal responsibility. My wife takes gabapentin; it is there to manage her pain (no disks between her lumbar spine, shredded after years of overworking herself). Regardless of his drinking and drug use, there is a time when you are sober before taking them and you make a conscious to get drunk or high. Stop it with the spin doctor crap and show a little humility for once in your life.
This story provides an opportunity to clear up some misconceptions.
Firstly, the fact is that an HIV positive person can still pass the virus even when their viral load is undetectable. Therefore, if they do not inform the other person of their status (as they should), then they must use protection.
Secondly, the dirty whore myth is still around, even when it is so easily refuted.
When I heard the story on the news and saw that the media were blaming sex workers I thought, “Yeah right! That’s about the least likely place he would have gotten HIV from.” The media as well as him just go along and reconfirm what the majority of people are already believe. He obviously doesn’t want to look like a fool for having unprotected sex.
I am, at best, extremely suspicious of stories about men catching HIV from having unprotected sex with women. From what I understand, the virus is fragile and not easily transmitted. See Fumento’s book for more details.
Speaking of celebrities, there was another bad player in the news today blaming his downfall and pedophilia on his addiction to porn and prostitutes. Also, his lawyer stated that when he started eating subway sandwiches and lost a lot of weight, he became obsessed with sex. Honestly, I read it in the news today. The judge was not too impressed; however, as the sentencing was rather harsh.
Quick question, Maggie. I assume that if Charlie Sheen had not openly admitted that he hired sex workers you would not be publishing this in your blog?
Sheen was outed as a client over 20 years ago and has never been apologetic about it, so that’s a moot point. The issue here is his trying to blame my sisters for his own risky behavior.
Thank you. I just wanted to clarify.
Sexworkers are not a hotbed of disease, but even if they were it would be stupid for clients to blame the workers. Clients as a whole would be just as responsible for the situation. The virus doesn’t care in which direction the money flows.
And about damage control by his PR team, it is bizarre that he would use his involment in the crime of buying sex as some kind of defense. In the current context, ”sex trafficking” seems to be more demonized than doing drugs. He won’t get sympathy from people who are either pro- or anti-sexwork. Abolitionists would say it serves him right for being an abuser of helpless victims who were infected by criminals like him.
Uhm, no. Breach of privacy and confidentiality is wrong, but it is not “as illegal” as having unprotected sex whilst being HIV positive. The latter is a f*** threat to life and health.
I have no idea what lambskin condoms do or do not do. Point is, when you’re HIV positive you’re freaking responsible for the persons you are sleeping with except for if you informed them and they choose to go ahead unprotected or badly protected.
[…] An escort who claims to have been hired by Sheen eloquently points out that in Hollywood, holding celebrities accountable “carries even more stigma than sex work does.” Stigma certainly operates both inside and outside the confines of Hollywood, but the vast majority of those affected by HIV are not afforded the same privileges as celebrities. Those affected by stigma—HIV positive people, sex workers, and of course HIV positive sex workers—experience it at both the micro and macro level. These experiences are highly varied and influenced by one’s identity and social status. In order to combat stigma, one cannot simply examine it through personal experience. Understanding the broader social situation and its structural inequalities is imperative. […]