Last week was a really strange one; it was as though something unwholesome was in the air. I spent large portions of every day on the phone, and only a little of it was in the relatively-pleasant task of giving interviews to reporters; the rest of it was spent putting out figurative fires and talking to customer service people about more glitches and problems than I usually have to deal with in a month. Most of the would-be clients who called me were nothing but wankers and time-wasters, and two good appointments that I was really looking forward to were postponed; one of those was my New York trip, which now looks like it’ll probably end up in October. And if that all weren’t bad enough, on Thursday the news spread through our community that Tahoe Ted, who was demonized by Seattle “authorities” for running a message board, took his own life rather than endure any more character assassination and emotional torture. Apparently, the prosecutor’s office doesn’t want this getting out because they realize it makes them look bad; they don’t want anyone realizing that their victims are human beings with lives and feelings, whose lives they wantonly destroy to “send messages” about people having sex for reasons sociopathic billionaires disapprove of. About the only good news I received last week was that my friend Savannah Sly is returning to Seattle soon; let’s hope she brings some good fortune with her.
Diary #324
September 13, 2016 by Maggie McNeill
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Damn. Glad to hear an update about review board and damn sorry to hear about Tahoe Ted. I hope things go better with you.
I haven’t been making comments lately, since I’ve been seeing your updates in my e-mail (which adds a layer or two between a post and a comment), but this one made me want to reach out.
Damn! Damn, on the wankers and the time wasters; damn, on the postponed appointments; but damn it all to hell, on Tahoe Ted.
We have some local review boards here. The owners are super-careful about them. At least one of them got shut down for a while (at least one re-opened under a different name). Damn.
I know that review boards are controversial. Their quality varies wildly. Some, in their “reviews” by clients of their experiences, consist of erotic wishful thinking. Some, in their forums, give misogynistic men a free-fire zone for their contempt for women.
But, if well-managed, a review board can provide some invaluable services. In its reviews, it can reassure clients that a new worker is a real person not a spam rip-off (or, worse, a LE sting). In its forums, it can offer a virtual space in which workers and clients can get to know each other, size each other up, and perhaps make their own decisions about each other. In its “worker-only” forums, it can allow workers to share their “black lists” with each other (“A” is probably dangerous; “B” is probably LE, and so forth).
Personally, I value the “intangibles” of companionship at least as highly as the mechanics of “performance” … so I have come to value those conversations. I do feel that they can give me some insight that ads and “reviews” might not.
The best-run board I have experienced was a local board, run by a local sex worker. She did not tolerate disrespectful chatter from the clients, and she did not allow pornographic reviews to go up on the board. What you got was good information, and good conversation.
At least one of the other local boards had a large number of the guys whom she had kicked off of hers. They whined about “that estrogen-soaked board,” and “the pussies [the men who didn’t get kicked off] who hang around there.” My take on that: *shrug* Talk to the hand, buddy. Your hand probably already has long and earnest conversations with your little head …
The board’s owner moved out of town several years ago, and she closed the board when she left. I was sorry to see it go.
Shame. It’s all about shame. There is so much shame. We grow up amidst so much shame; we are soaked, no marinated, in so much shame. Like dry rot, it destroys so much of us, in women and in men, invisibly, from the inside.
Damn.
It is not your imagination
You have attracted the attention of the ungodly
and your defences are being probed.
They noticed you late, and you have the advantage for now.
They are sneaky but linear, and follow a general playbook.
Stage 1, distraction.
Time-wasters to wear you out, book deals or funded research to take you off-topic. Laughter and honesty are your friends here.
Stage 2, body blow.
Typically an invalid but hard-to-disprove legal charge a la Bill Cosby or dispossession of your home. If they can get you to burn out your heart or wallet they win by default. Pace yourself.
Stage 3, isolation.
They will go after your friends and customers, with little subtlety or justice.
Not pretty, but hard to sustain once it becomes known.
You will lose friends you thought solid, and gain many you did not know existed. A test of wills.
Stage 4, assassination.
The rifleman’s bullet or an unfortunate mugging.
I cannot advise you on this. Learn armed and unarmed combat?
Not so much to fight as to interpret what is happening.
Live well, and go down swinging if the end comes. It makes a difference.
With all my best wishes