I’m really pretty damned sick of social engineers claiming that it’s “bigoted” or “sexist” or whatever for men (or lesbians) not to socially date (ie, have sex with) women of some particular group (such as older women, obese women, trans women, kinky women, etc). Tellingly, nobody (except the “women don’t date nice guys” cult) tries to put similar pressure on straight women or gay men; apparently, it’s perfectly OK to refuse to date any man for any reason. Only women apparently need to be “protected” by forcing people to have sex with them whether they like it or not, and the authoritarians who subscribe to this revolting policy usually appear to have no issue with queer people refusing to socially date those of the opposite sex. So according to them, all factors of attraction except homosexuality are purely voluntary and can be changed as easily as I change my underwear. Well, I’m here to tell you that this is 100% pure, reeking bullshit. Nobody can help who they’re attracted to, and nobody has the right to demand any individual socially date any people of a certain group (not talking about sex work here). For example, I’m too old, too busty, too muscular, too intellectual, too talkative, too intense, too kinky, etc for some guys, and just the fact that I’m female means a lot of women aren’t interested in me sexually. Similarly, I’m extremely picky about who I sleep with for free. And that’s all perfectly OK. Nobody, repeat NOBODY, has the right to demand anyone else have sex with them or anyone else, any more than they have the right to stop anyone from having sex with consenting partners or policing their reasons for having sex. Furthermore, to make such a demand, or to insult and socially pressure people for refusing sexual contact with some others, demonstrates an utter disregard for the most basic principles of consent. It’s not only reprehensible and, frankly, disgusting; it is the mindset of a rapist, and nobody with the faintest modicum of respect for individual rights should tolerate it in even the slightest degree.
My Body is Not Yours
January 19, 2018 by Maggie McNeill
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[…] via My Body is Not Yours — The Honest Courtesan […]
Cheers to you, Maggie!! I second this emotion whole-heartedly as an outcry against double standards and hypocrisy. It reminds me of the recent tragic suicide of adult entertainer August Ames, who refused to have sex on camera with a crossover male performer, and many in the cyber-world accused her of bigotry. This cyber-bullying supposedly prompted her to take her own life. Though this dynamic (woman refusing sex work with a male) is not where you started (men accused of bigotry for refusing sex with certain women), it is the same hypocritical horse crap that prompted your wonderful stance against similar bullying in the name of “social justice.”
That was the first thing that popped into my mind as well.
Out of the park Maggie, that’s where you hit that one.
As someone with a not-so-perfect body, not to mention a speech disability, here’s what I have to say to the fauxminist morons who think they need to defend me from “lookism” and other forms of “bigotry” …
I DON’T NEED YOUR HELP, THANKS!
I get plenty of nice nookie from people who don’t need their arms or any other body part twisted. If these dogmatic dingbats understood anything about human nature, it’s that everyone has different tastes and standards, and trying to make everybody like everybody is just plain hopeless.
As the French ably say: à chacun ses goûts.
The specificity of their horror that people don’t want to have sex with certain other people reveals exactly what is going on: they simply hate straight men, tht’s all.
The wider issue here is freedom of association, which includes freedom of dissociation. Anybody should be free to decline to associate with anybody (barring any previous contractual commitment). Doctors should be free to decline abortions, bakers to choose not to provide wedding cakes to gay couples, or even shopkeepers barring blacks from their shops. Most of would of course steer clear of such shopkeepers but it’s important to all of us that their freedom of dissociation be observed.
…Why would I even want to fuck someone who doesn’t find me attractive? That sounds awful 😛 Besides, as a chubby, busty, tattooed redheaded geek, there are a lot of people who are into my type specifically, & I’d be totally wasted on anyone else ;P Why would I do that that?
Similarly, I’m insanely picky about my own male partners, but the traits I find attractive are often things most women are apparently not into. For men, I’m exclusively into straight or bisexual “twinks”; skinny, baby-faced boys without too much muscle or body hair. They also have to be shy & sweet & extremely geeky, so I’m pretty sick of the claim that girls only date older “bad boys”, & never “nice guys”. I’m a bad girl who likes nice boys 😉 & there are plenty of nice girls looking for nice men, too. Just not living doormats 9_9
(As far as women go, I like pussies & dicks, as long as she’s at least a B-cup. But girl-girl attraction is harder to quantify.)
I am reminded of a dialogue.
She: I only date smart boys.
He: E=MC2
She: CHOKE ME DADDY
He: I only date smart girls.
She: RESTRICT MY AIRFLOW PATRIARCHAL FIGURE.
I don’t know why that came to mind. But it did.