If you accept money from someone that he gives due to sexual interest in you, then you are a whore and everything else is just semantics. – “Whorearchy”
Two weeks ago I published “Out of the Woodwork“, in which I wrote, “since the guys who used to use Backpage now don’t know where to go, they’re inflicting their ham-handed ‘Hey sexy’ and untutored ‘qv avail?’ texts on sex workers who aren’t used to dealing with that (and in my case, lack the patience).” I’ve also taken to Twitter to mock some of the more ridiculous approaches I’ve received. And though I’ve only been attacked once because of it (by a racist troll whose first text was so vile I felt as though I needed a shower, and whom I instantly muted so I wouldn’t accidentally see more), I still feel it’s important to make my position very clear, both for my friends and readers who did use Backpage, and for the general readership. Though my attitude about whorearchy is well-known and I often roll my eyes at snobbery and express my disgust for sex workers who try to draw artificial lines between themselves and others, I still feel it’s important in these difficult times to assure all of my sisters that we are in this together. I have nothing but respect for Backpage ladies’ amazing patience and ability to find gold by sifting through junk; they’re like those people who can go to yard sales and thrift stores and find all the valuable antiques. I have neither the skill nor the patience to do it. I don’t think any kind of sex worker is “better” than any other kind; we’re all sisters, we all do the same type of work, and authoritarians & prudes hate us all equally. But the skill set is different for every market segment, and I simply don’t have the skill set for PSE, street work, professional-level domination, Backpage work, casino work, or many other types; truth be told, I’m not very good at phone sex either, and as I’ve pointed out in the past, nobody would ever pay to see me dance with my clothes on. What I am very good at is GFE and courtesan-style companionship, dates that are just as likely to involve chatting, hand-holding, intellectual discussion, counseling and/or teaching as they are kissing, sucking and fucking. Some friends of mine tell me they don’t see how I can do GFE; either they find it emotionally draining, or too intimate, or else they just can’t keep a conversation going with a quiet guy without making him feel they’re talking at him rather than to him. But it comes so naturally to me, I think I could even do it in a drunken stupor. Sex workers each have our own abilities and aptitudes, and we gravitate to those forms of sex work which suit us best. And that doesn’t make any of us “better” or “higher” or more “legitimate” than others, nor more immune to the growing power of the Moral Climate Monitors who want us all either unemployed or “rescued” into re-education camps.
I’m just going to leave this here, no telling when it might just get deleted coz the post became a hot-potato that’s too hot to handle. This comic could definitely have been made better but I don’t think the artist intended anything more than just “sticking it to the man” or starting a conversation, & for that it’s pretty adequate.
https://www.instagram.com/p/Bi698DlFrZj/
Comments are restricted, but oh lordy, it’s still a warzone out there.
Thank you x 100. So glad I fpund your column in a world of anti-sex work. It gets me so angry these so- called “gate-keepers” of morality & what is or is not normal. I live in South Africa where most people are staunch Christians. What pain they are. Anyway, best to keep my jib as adult massage thetapist& dex worker quiet. Thanks again, Maggie for your voice ofvreason
Sorry, about all the spelling & grammar mistakes. I cannot find the edit button to click.
Typos at least give us readers an opportunity to amuse ourselves by speculating about what “thetapist” and ”dex worker” might mean.
Thanks for your reply. I cannot even remember writing this. But it sounds quite good. Fortunately my smart phone is helping me with all the spelling.
Amen sister. I am unfortunately one of those ladies who still have to do quite a bit of “sifting through junk”. This will hopefully be changing as I am gathering more regular clients who I feel comfortable and happy with just being myself. They make my occupation a pleasure.
Monya
South Africa