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That Is So Hot!

Posted in Miscellaneous, Perception, Philosophy, tagged , , , , on April 19, 2011| 204 Comments »

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.  –  Reinhold Niebuhr

One day a few years ago I was washing clothes, and when the machine shut off I discovered to my chagrin that it had failed to spin after the final rinse; the machine was thus still full of water.  I turned the dial back to “spin” and even tried spinning it in other cycles, to no avail; something was clearly wrong with the mechanism.  So I called Grace, who is very handy with such things, and she told me to empty the machine so she could tilt it as needed in the repair process.  I laboriously wrung out all the clothes and put them in the dryer, but the only clean hose my husband could find to use as a siphon was just a little smaller than a standard garden hose.  I dropped the one end into the rinsewater and he said, “That hose is too big; you’re not going to be able to create enough suction to get it started.”

“O ye of little faith,” I replied, and set to work sucking on the hose until I could draw no more; I then quickly kinked it to prevent air pressure from forcing the water back down, caught my breath for a minute, and repeated the suction.  After about three or four iterations of this process I got a big mouthful of water and immediately dropped the upper end into a bucket, then succumbed to a fit of heavy coughing due to aspirated water.  My husband patted me on the back to assist in getting the nasty water out of my lungs, and as soon as I was done choking and wheezing and he knew I was all right, he looked into my teary, red eyes and said, “That was so hot!”

I guess some women would’ve been upset or angry and accused him of not caring about my distress, but I laughed because it was so typically masculine.  He didn’t speak until he knew that I was all right, and I appreciated the sincerity of the compliment; a man only finds something like that sexy if the woman doing it is attractive.  If Grace had been the one sucking on that oversized hose he might’ve been impressed but not stimulated because he doesn’t find her attractive, but because it was me he couldn’t help noticing the sexual overtones of my performance.

What reminded me of this story was a video which made the rounds on the internet last week, or more specifically the reactions to it.  Many male commenters on various sites declared the girl (named Mel) and/or video “kinda hot” or even “really hot”, while (predictably) a number of feminist commenters pissed and moaned a la “why does everything about women have to have a sexual connotation?” etc.  But as I said in the paragraph above, this isn’t exactly true; if Mel had been fat, middle-aged and ill-favored people might’ve been enchanted with her talent (as they were with Susan Boyle or Ted Williams) but wouldn’t have said anything about “hot”.  But that isn’t the case; she has a pretty face, beautiful eyes, healthy hair and a cute smile and comes across in the video as sweet and fun-loving.  She’s therefore captured male attention before she even opens her mouth, and everything else follows like rail cars behind a locomotive.  Once a man finds himself attracted by a woman, any other positive quality – intelligence, compassion, talent, style, education, etc – tends to be viewed as an enhancement to that attraction.

Now, I understand that women who are unattractive, hate men or have been brainwashed into thinking beauty equals “objectification” might resent this, but the depth of their fanaticism both fascinates and repels me.  How can anyone be so deeply in denial about Nature that she fails to understand that this is the way it has to be?  The things men are programmed to find attractive in women (youth, symmetrical features, clear eyes and skin, shiny hair, a normal weight ratio, etc) are all evidence of health and good genes, and though we humans have added layers of meaning to sexuality its most basic purpose as far as our hindbrains are concerned is reproduction, and there is no getting around that.  If men were not interested in sex as much as they are our species would have died out long ago, and any wrongheaded attempt to reprogram the male brain to be able to turn the sex drive on and off at will, or to be sexually attracted by some artificial non-reproductive criterion feminists consider palatable, is doomed to fail just as surely as attempts to reprogram people to crave foods of low caloric value (leaves, etc) over those of high caloric value (fats and sweets).  And a good thing, too, because anyone who ate only lettuce and celery would die of malnutrition as soon as he exhausted his fat reserves, and if men were attracted to asymmetry, obesity and old age our species would die off in a few dozen generations due to attrition and accumulated genetic problems.

Bitching about the criteria by which men are attracted to women (or women to men, for that matter) is like complaining about the sky being blue or water being wet; it’s the sort of asinine waste of time which could only be found among privileged, pampered individuals in an overcivilized society who have nothing more important to concern themselves with.  There are many, many things in the world which can be changed and many others which cannot, and those who learn to tell the difference are a lot better-adjusted and fundamentally happier.

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April Miscellanea (Part One)

Posted in Current Events, Miscellaneous, News, Perception, The Dark Side, Tyranny, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 16, 2011| 43 Comments »

The trouble with lying and deceiving is that their efficiency depends entirely upon a clear notion of the truth that the liar and deceiver wishes to hide.  In this sense, truth, even if it does not prevail in public, possesses an ineradicable primacy over all falsehoods.  –  Hannah Arendt

It’s time for my monthly collection of stories related to sex work, the rights of those who do it and the attempts of sex-haters to repress us out of existence.

Judd Not, Lest Ye Be Judded

In my column of April 2nd I expressed considerable anger toward Ashley Judd’s poisonous lie that normal men “buy children for sex” (i.e. knowingly hire underage prostitutes).  But after hearing about this new story I have to wonder whether she isn’t completely delusional.  Apparently, she recently released a memoir in which she claims to have been raped and otherwise sexually abused by family members and other parties.  But when confronted with the fact that most of the events in her memoir didn’t happen as she claimed they did, Judd said on the Today show that “The book is very honest, it’s not necessarily accurate, because everyone in a family has their own perspective and their own experience.  But it’s very true for me.”  In other words, Judd thinks it’s OK to libel and slander people and accuse them of crimes they didn’t commit as long as one wants to pretend these things happened in order to blame somebody else for her problems, or to hold a pity party for herself in order to prop up a sagging career.  And since she obviously thinks it’s acceptable and even “honest” to defame the characters of her own parents, I guess her accusing the majority of the male population of collusion in child sex slavery isn’t so bad.  The Salon reporter who wrote this story from April 6th clearly thinks it’s virtuous to trash other peoples’ reputations in order to make oneself feel better, but the majority of the commenters are far more rational.

Breaking News:  President Obama has a Human Friend!

I’m glad this “dog bites man” article wasn’t more publicized than it was.  The president has a friend who got caught doing what 70% of men have done at one time or another.  From the Huffington Post of April 6th:

One of President Barack Obama’s close friends has been arrested in Honolulu on suspicion of soliciting a prostitute.  Honolulu police say Robert “Bobby” Titcomb was one of four men arrested in an undercover sting operation late Monday and released on $500 bail.  The 49-year-old Titcomb attended Punahou School in Honolulu with Obama.  The two often golf, play basketball, go to the beach and dine together when the president returns home to Hawaii for vacation…Titcomb has not publicly responded to the charges, and he wasn’t immediately available for comment.

And just in case you’re still awake, here’s another non-news item:

I Told You So

Same song, 365th verse:  the number of men who can make a decent living working as male escorts for female customers is vanishingly small, and I doubt there’s a city on Earth where there are five of them.  But TV is not reality and in male fantasyland there are just oodles of women lining up to pay for sex with men.  Unfortunately for the Showtime network, in reality women have to be paid to pretend that they’re willing to pay to have sex with men.  Yawn.

Also in Jezebel:

Anna North wonders if cops are committing more sex crimes than they used to in a story which compares a firefighting instructor’s use of sexual metaphors with forcible rape.  Frankly, Miss North, I doubt they’re committing more rapes these days than ever before; it’s just that because of the internet it’s harder for them to suppress the stories than it used to be.

Video:  Sex Workers Refute the Claims of Neofeminist Prohibitionists

Though the sound quality in this video (courtesy of Harlot’s Parlour) leaves much to be desired, the girls in it make many of the same arguments I do about the fact that neofeminist efforts to prohibit sex work actually infantilize women and restrict our rights rather than promoting them as the prohibitionists claim.

Backfire

Demi Moore and her boy sex slave, unsatisfied with merely insulting people who have forgotten more about sex work and migrant labor than they have ever known, have recruited their equally empty-headed celebrity friends to create a new series of commercials with which to convince people that “real men don’t buy child sex slaves.”  Because obviously if there are 300,000 child sex slaves in the United States, then there must also be 300,000 child sex slave owners (who presumably store them in cardboard boxes at the top of the closet when not in use), and a series of dumb commercials will obviously convince them to get rid of those slaves, perhaps by flushing them down the loo like unwanted goldfish.  But what Demi and company overlooked is that not everyone is a gullible twit who will believe everything a celebrity tells him, and that there are a number of us getting the word out about the falsity of “trafficking” rhetoric.  The result:  Widespread derision and ridicule of the campaign all over the internet. Even Jezebel, which is usually pretty credulous about the whole “child sex slave” mythology, was unimpressed.

I’m Not At All Surprised, and That’s Truly Sad

Some of the investigators working on the Long Island Serial Killer case now theorize that the killer may be a cop or ex-cop, as reported in this New York Times story from April 9th:

Whoever killed four prostitutes, and possibly four other people, and then dumped their bodies in heavy underbrush along a beachfront causeway on Long Island appears to have a sophisticated understanding of police investigative techniques…taunting phone calls…to the teenage sister of one of the victims…were made from…some of the most crowded locations in New York City…and…were probably chosen because they allowed the caller to blend into crowds, so that if investigators pinpointed his location from the cellphone’s signal, they would be unable to pick him out of the crowd using any nearby surveillance cameras…This fact, as well as the killer’s use of disposable cellphones to contact the four victims who have been identified…suggested to some investigators that the killer was well versed in criminal investigative techniques…and could even be in law enforcement himself.  “He is a guy who is aware of how we utilize technology,” one investigator said.  “Frankly, people are thinking maybe he could be a cop” — either one still in law enforcement or one who has moved on…the caller kept each of his…calls to less than three minutes…the brief duration…thwarted efforts by the New York Police Department to use the signal to pinpoint the caller’s location and find him…

As we’ve discussed on several occasions, police violence toward prostitutes is depressingly typical, and sociopaths often target prostitutes because of the widespread attitude that we are disposable.  But it’s both sad and disgusting (though not, alas, surprising) when both of those motivations occur in one individual.

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A Tale That Grew in the Telling

Posted in Miscellaneous, Perception, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , on April 2, 2011| 65 Comments »

The least initial deviation from the truth is multiplied later a thousandfold. –  Aristotle

A few days ago regular reader Joyce sent me this article which had me shaking my head; it’s fairly typical trafficking hype with a celebrity mouthpiece, but it was different in one way which bears note:

…Ashley Judd reveals a moving story about a 14-year-old daughter of a friend of hers who was recently forced into prostitution in Atlanta, Georgia.  “Who are these men who buy children for sex?” asks Judd. “They are our fathers, they are our brothers, our husbands, uncles, cousins, and friends…it is so common”…according to The Daily Beast, 100,000 – 300,000 children between the ages of 12 and 14 years old are victims of the child sex trade in this country.

Those of us who love men and hate seeing them maligned may be so angered by Judd’s evil rhetoric that they may miss the only important aspect of this propaganda piece; I can assure Miss Judd that no man I know and certainly not my father, brother, husband or any uncle or friend (and I doubt any cousins either) has ever “bought a child for sex” or any other purpose.  Nobody I knew even had any basement, attic or shed where such a slave could have been kept, and normal modern men do NOT keep slaves except in the perverted sex fantasies of Judd and her fetishist friends.  Now, I think it’s highly likely that what she really means when she says “buy children for sex” is “hire prostitutes whom they may not realize are under 18”, but it isn’t what she’s saying.

The biggest danger of such rhetoric is that it plays fast and loose with the facts and the tale grows in the telling.  Girls who can’t be told from legal adults become “children”, hiring for a service becomes “buying for sex” as though they were carried home in a plain brown wrapper and stored in a drawer in the nightstand, and a rare event (only about 3.54% of all prostitutes are underage) becomes a “hidden epidemic” and normal, decent men are accused en masse.  But we’ve seen all that before; what makes this article unique is that it affords us the rare opportunity to catch a lie in the actual process of growth.  The author says “according to the Daily Beast, 100,000 – 300,000 children between the ages of 12 and 14 years old are victims of the child sex trade in this country” and helpfully provides us a link.  But if you click on that link you’ll find that’s not what the article says at all; the actual quote is “Between 100,000 and 300,000 children—primarily girls between the ages of 12 and 14—are victims of the sex trade right here in the United States.”  The new claim drops “primarily” and represents all of them as being in that age range.

The “300,000 trafficked children” fantasy grew by exactly such misquotes.  Its original source was a 2001 study by Richard Estes and Neil Weiner of the University of Pennsylvania which guesstimated (by questionable methodology) that “as many as 100,000-300,000 children and youth [of both sexes] are at risk for sexual exploitation” of one kind or another.  Note that even if we accept the shaky methodology, this guess is for BOTH sexes, for “children and youth” (not just children), and most importantly represents those at risk of some form of “exploitation”, not currently involved in one specific form (sex trafficking).  The paper is very revealing; if you peruse it you will see that Estes and Weiner rank types of “exploitation” by frequency, and that domestic and international “sex trafficking” are second and third from the bottom.  Even these highly biased and excitable gentlemen believed that “sex trafficking” affected only a tiny part of their “youth at risk”.  The categories are, in order from most common to least common, sexual molestation by acquaintances, sexual molestation by family members, pornography (including, apparently, just looking at porn), gay sex, stripping, sexual contributions by girls to gangs, pimped prostitution (for girls) and entrepreneurial prostitution (for boys).

Richard Estes and Neil Weiner

Reading the descriptions of these categories is a jaw-dropping experience; one wonders how the authors could possibly have been unaware of the flagrant exposure of their biases (of which there are quite a few).  Just looking at porn is considered somehow exploitative and pederasty is automatically classed as exploitation even if voluntary.  The inclusion of stripping in clubs and working for modeling agencies and escort services reveals that at least some of the “youth at risk” are of legal age to work in such venues, and we are told “Modeling, nude dancing, lap dancing and similar sexually provocative activities frequently are used to lure girls into prostitution; at a minimum, these activities serve as the basis for involving girls in pornography.”  I’ll bet that comes as a surprise to all of my readers who have worked in strip clubs; how did I miss all those pimps hanging around “luring” girls into prostitution or porn acting?  But the most telling example of bias is that, though entrepreneurial (i.e. voluntary) prostitution is listed as a category for boys, it is not for girls; Estes and Weiner automatically class all female prostitutes as involuntary, controlled and exploited!

To sum up, then, what this study actually says is “We can’t be sure because it’s really hard to count, but we think that up to 100,000 (and maybe, possibly as high as 300,000) people of both sexes from puberty until their late teens possibly may at some point come close to being sexually involved with people who are older than them, and this includes stumbling on internet porn, going to work in strip clubs to support themselves after 18, joining gangs and having older boyfriends.  Of these possibilities trafficking is the least common.  Oh, and we don’t accept that women can ever voluntarily engage in prostitution because they’re too stupid to be entrepreneurs; only guys are smart enough to do that.”  But in the past ten years, this tale has grown considerably; the 100,000-300,000 is represented as a proper statistical estimate rather than a broad guess, and as the number currently “exploited” rather than merely “at risk”.  The figure is usually said to represent only girls rather than both sexes and only “children” rather than “children, adolescents and 18-19 year old legal adults”.  But worst of all, the least common of Estes and Weiner’s categories of “sexual exploitation” is represented as its entirety!  The usual quote is something like “100,000-300,000 children are currently exploited by the sex trade in the United States”, which is a far cry from what the study actually says!

But it gets worse; this same study is also the source of the ubiquitous “the average age of entry into prostitution is 14” (or 13, or 12) myth which I exploded in my column of November 27th.  What it actually says is that among underage street prostitutes (i.e. those who were under 18 when interviewed), “The age range of entry…for the boys…was somewhat younger than that of the girls, i.e., 11-13 years vs. 12-14 years, respectively.”  However, the data published with the study does not support this conclusion; as explained in this mathematical analysis, if we assume that the study’s survey figures are reliable, the average age of entry for underage prostitutes (those of 18 or above being specifically excluded by the authors) is 15.91.  The authors do not claim that most prostitutes start at 12-14, but that most underage ones do; furthermore, they don’t claim that most underage prostitutes are currently that age, only that most started at that age (and even that is incorrect).  The widespread misuse is equivalent to the statement “most Americans learn to drive at 16” being warped into “most American drivers are 16.”

Combining all these distortions together finally gives us the Daily Beast’s claim, and though it would take weeks of research to pin down all the stages in the transformation (if we could find them at all), I do note that the combination of the age myth with the number myth is very recent; i.e. the claim that the victims are “primarily girls between the ages of 12 and 14” dates to this year.  Finally, with the new permutation quoted at the top of this column the tall tale has attained wholly ludicrous proportions; since there are only about 5.8 million girls of 12-14 in the U.S., the fanatics are now claiming that about 5% of them are sex slaves, which I fancy is too big a whopper even for the terminally gullible who make up the bulk of the population.

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March Q & A

Posted in Miscellaneous, Perception, Q & A, tagged , , , , , , , , on March 31, 2011| 74 Comments »

A wise man can learn more from a foolish question than a fool can learn from a wise answer. –  Bruce Lee

Another monthly collection of (I hope) helpful answers to questions posed by curious readers.

How do you expose a gay man pretending to be a woman on a chat site?

Well, first of all, not every man pretending to be a woman on a chat site is gay.  As I discussed in my column of November 14th, some are trolls or “geeks” desperate for attention, others are cops or injustice perverts trying to trick people, and many are probably just horny guys trying to create interactive porn stories they can wank themselves to. But no matter what the motivation, a guy is a guy and will tend to act and think like a guy despite his best efforts to disguise himself.  It’s a pretty safe bet that any chat-room “woman” you get a really strange “vibe” from is probably a man, and if “she” wants to start talking about sex right away or asks you to describe or send pictures of your penis, you’re almost certainly talking to a guy.

But let’s assume your cyberdrag aficionado is practiced enough to avoid such rookie mistakes; how can you tell then?  Well, you could ask questions that real women can answer easily but men tend to have trouble with, like bust size; confused by porn and men’s magazines, guys will often combine a bust measurement with a cup size to create hybrids like “42D”, which would be the bra size of a rather big woman.  The relationship between measurements and dress size is also a mystery to most men; if your self-proclaimed “hot babe” claims to be busty but supposedly wears a size 2 dress, it’s either a guy or a fat woman with a really low opinion of your intelligence.  Just for comparison, I’m 5’5” tall and 132#, wear a 34DDD bra, my waist is 25” and my hips are 36”, and I wear about a size 7 if the dress is cut loose or made with spandex, 9 if it’s tight or of stiffer fabric.  There are others, but obviously you might just be a “cyberqueen” yourself trying to trick me into giving you a checklist.  Your best bet is just to pay attention to conversational style, which is hard to fake.

In the comments for my February Q & A column Americanus wrote, “It’s very nice to see women giving such great advice on blow jobs.  It may sound selfish but I certainly would be open to advice on how to improve on oral from my end as well.”

The single most important piece of sexual advice I can give a man is “pay attention”.  Most women are very sensitive to our partners’ feelings and often aren’t entirely honest about what we like for fear of bruising male egos; we thus tend to remain silent when we don’t like something because the truth is often greeted with the sort of hurt look one sees on the face of a kicked dog.  So we fake orgasms, endure bad oral sex and suggest changing positions to escape activities which have become intolerable.  And even if you have unusually high self-esteem and can accept the sexual criticism most men cannot, your partner may not know that and probably won’t risk finding out.  But there’s a way to break the cycle:  don’t listen to her words, pay attention to her reactions.  As you try your favorite oral technique on her, watch and listen for sounds of pleasure and arousal; if you don’t see them, try something else until you hit on something that seems to work better.  Do more of whatever she seems to like and less of whatever she seems to dislike or not care about, and you’ll be surprised at how quickly your technique improves.  Ladies, this works in reverse as well; most men will unconsciously pick up on such cues, so make sure you visibly and/or audibly react to things you like so as to encourage them, and go quiet and still for things you dislike so as to discourage them.  This lets him know your preferences without the risk of hurting his feelings, and has the advantage of letting him think the changes in technique are his idea.

A few dos and don’ts are in order, though; guys, the most sensitive part of a woman’s sexual anatomy is the clitoris, not the vagina.  Licking and (if it’s large enough) sucking on the clit will accomplish a lot more than trying to stick your tongue inside her or lapping her vulva like a dog drinking from a bowl.  Some women’s clits are so sensitive they cannot stand to have them directly touched; if your lady is like that just work though the hood.  In other cases (including yours truly) the clitoral hood is so thick that unless it’s moved you won’t accomplish anything; this is a prime example of the need for paying attention.  Finally, remember that the entire area is very sensitive; a stubbly face rubbed or ground into a woman’s crotch can be acutely painful.

Though there are a few constants, different women like different things so there is no substitute for learning your partner’s individual preferences.  And I suspect we’ll get a demonstration of that over the next few days as my female readers chime in on what they enjoy best in oral technique.

Recently, a guy started a thread on ECCIE in which he asked why mature escorts are still interested in sex while so many middle-aged women aren’t.  He asked if they used hormones or special exercises or anything like that.  What’s your opinion on the subject?

Don’t tell me, let me guess:  The thread was full of escorts talking about how “horny” they are all the time.  I really don’t know why guys start threads like that on hooker boards; do they actually expect honest answers, or are they just looking for fantasy material?  If any of those women answered honestly it could adversely affect her business; most men prefer to embrace the myth of the wanton than to acknowledge the uncomfortable reality that escorts have sex for money, not because they’re nymphos who want nothing better than to jump into bed with an endless series of (often unappealing) strangers.  Obviously, escorts are generally more open to sex than many amateurs or else they wouldn’t be very successful, but for the most part the reason they’re more “interested” than wives is that their livelihoods depend on it.  In defense of the wives, I must point out that if their husbands flattered and pursued them like they do whores the wives might feel (and act) a whole lot sexier.  Of course, the average high-dollar hooker puts forth a lot more effort to be sexy than the average wife, so it cuts both ways.  If both husbands and wives tried a little harder, their sex lives might not go south quite as badly.  As for the hormone thing, I already discussed that on February 5th.

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A Foregone Conclusion

Posted in Miscellaneous, Perception, tagged , , , , , , , , on March 26, 2011| 45 Comments »

Women need a reason to have sex.  Men just need a place. –  Billy Crystal

One of the very first topics I covered in this blog (on July 20th and 21st) was the fact that, for the most part, the female customer of male prostitutes is a myth.  Here’s what I said about it in “The Myth of the Wanton”:

But the strangest symptom of the general ignorance about women’s sexuality is the persistent myth of the female customer, the woman who is so desperate for sex that she’s willing to pay a man for it.  Hollywood loves to perpetuate this one, and not a month passed that I didn’t get a call from some guy who wanted to work as a male escort catering solely to women.  Despite the fact that my ad clearly stated “female escorts,” I always took the time to explain to these fantasy-addled men that the only way for male prostitutes to actually make a living is to see men; I was generally met with incredulity and I’m sure a number of them only called another service after hanging up with me.  They just couldn’t get it through their thick skulls that WOMEN DON’T NEED TO PAY FOR IT.  This obvious fact even seems occasionally to escape the minds of people who should know better, because every so often somebody announces that she’s going to open a brothel or escort service featuring male prostitutes who cater strictly to women.  The service opens to great fanfare, then within a few months either closes or starts accepting male customers.

The perfect illustration of the concluding point of that passage came just one year ago today as “Markus”, America’s first legal male prostitute, quit just two months after his much-ballyhooed arrival.  The reason?  He had fewer than 10 paying customers in all that time, as described in this excerpt from The Huffington Post of March 29, 2010:

America’s first legal male prostitute has left a rural Nevada brothel after a two-month stint that generated plenty of attention but fewer than 10 paying customers.  Brothel owner Jim Davis said Friday (March 26th, 2010) the Shady Lady Ranch had parted ways with the “prostitude” who worked under the name Markus.  A replacement has been hired…a Las Vegas man in his mid-30s who works under the name Y. Not and has had about 10 customers.  The focus of the business, however, will remain on women prostitutes serving men…Male companions were “never the main course,” [Bobbi Davis] said. “We’re going to try it for a while longer.”

The Shady Lady Ranch created a stir in Nevada’s brothel industry when it successfully won state and county approval to hire a male sex worker.  After hiring Markus, the Davises cut him off from speaking with reporters after his first two interviews, in which he compared himself with Rosa Parks and Mahatma Gandhi…

Though I remember the media circus surrounding his hire, I missed the announcement of his resignation last March, probably because there was almost no media attention to it and I wasn’t writing this blog yet (and therefore had no readers to call it to my attention!)  If I thought about him at all I assumed he had either quietly quit or just as quietly started taking male customers so he could actually make a living (back when his hiring was first announced my husband said, “He’s going to be the poorest man in Nevada.”)  But recently, regular reader Sailor Barsoom mentioned the article after encountering it himself in a link from an article about Harry Reid’s asinine remarks of last month, and I decided the anniversary of his departure from Male Fantasyland on a one-way trip back to reality was worth noting.

Why did the Davises hire him in the first place when they knew full well he wouldn’t get enough business to pay his way?  Publicity, of course, of which they got plenty.  Much of it was bad, but some people believe there’s no such thing as bad publicity.  Perhaps; if things go as they usually do it’ll be about four more years before someone tries this particular publicity stunt again.  In any case, the rest of the brothel owners knew better; back when Markus was first hired Dennis Hof, owner of the Moonlite Bunny Ranch, said “What woman with any money is going to go that three or four hours out of their way to do this?  Nobody.  A year from now, we’re going to have a good laugh about this.”  And I’m sure they’re doing exactly that.

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The First Time

Posted in Call types, Perception, Philosophy, Q & A, tagged , , , , , , , on March 20, 2011| 25 Comments »

Minor things can become moments of great revelation when encountered for the first time. –  Margot Fonteyn

A week ago Friday (March 11th), I received the following email from a young man who asked to be called “Joseph”:

First, allow me to say that I greatly admire your blog.  I stumbled across it while trying to find out more about that recent CNN special about ‘selling the girl next door’ and found it very enlightening, intriguing and engrossing.  And a bit frustrating, since I am in my mid-20’s, still a virgin, never even had a girlfriend (one high school crush notwithstanding) and can’t envision getting laid unless I found someone like yourself (in your previous job of course).  That’s impossible because of my job (military stationed overseas).

Since I can’t ask you to help me break regulations and find a professional in my area, I have another question.  You’ve mentioned that occasionally parents would hire you to take their son’s virginity.  Would you ever talk more about that?  I’m not looking for lurid details, mind you, but what were those jobs like?  Did the parents tell you why they went to such lengths?  Did the son know about what the parents were going to do?

Anyway, thank you for your time and keep up the fine work.  I read your blog every day.

As I’ve written before I’m especially fond of military men, so I told Joseph that I would be happy to oblige.  Joseph, if I don’t answer your questions adequately please let me know and I’ll try to elaborate in a response!

At the time I received my first such request, my personal policy was not to see men under 21; any younger than that just didn’t feel right.  Not that we exactly had a large volume of requests from men that young, mind you; it’s pretty rare that any man below about 25 has the money to hire an escort.  Once in a while there’s the frat boy type, but that’s about it.  Well one night, I went on what I expected to be a normal call; the gentleman sounded middle-aged, was polite, from another state, staying in a nice hotel, that sort of thing.  And when I got there he was much as I had expected, but before he paid me he told me that he had actually called me for his son, who had just turned 18.  Now, I knew that at one time it was not at all uncommon for fathers to hire prostitutes to take their sons’ virginity, but it’s not exactly usual nowadays and in any event I had never done it.  Still, I’ve never been one to turn down new experiences so I agreed.

The young man was, understandably, very nervous; it didn’t seem to bother him that I was 10 years older than he was (actually 15, but I claimed 28 in those days), but he had never been alone with a naked woman in a well-lit room before.  I asked him what sort of experience he had and it was the usual fumbling through clothes in dark cars with high-school girls, so I invited him to look me over and touch me as he pleased. Like many virgins he was almost too gentle for fear of hurting me, but I assured him he needn’t be so tentative and that if he accidentally hurt me I would let him know.  We didn’t do anything really unusual; I gave him the typical activities most men like, and even though I didn’t usually kiss clients I was happy to show him how most girls like to be kissed.  I kept the pace relaxed and interspersed with bits of casual conversation so he could see I wasn’t all that different from any other women he had known.  Inexperienced men often find experienced women quite intimidating, so I was careful to make everything seem as natural and comfortable as I could.

From my high school and university days I knew that virgins and near-virgins tend either to climax very quickly or to take an extremely long time due to nerves and performance anxiety; he was one of the latter sort, so I kissed and verbally encouraged him until nature took its course.  We then lay together for a long time while I caressed his chest and reassured him; like many young men he was very concerned that he had performed adequately.  I said he had done just great and that if he always strove to pay attention in bed, to give his partners more of whatever they seemed to like and to avoid whatever they seemed not to like, I was pretty sure most of his future girlfriends would be very happy with him.  All in all, I really made an effort to make the experience as special and memorable to him as possible; after all, to me he was only one customer, but to him I was and always would be his first.  And I must have succeeded, because later that evening I got a call from the father thanking me for making his son so happy; apparently the young man was singing my praises after I left!

He was the first young man whom I initiated, but he wasn’t the last; sometimes they paid for themselves, one was paid for by his friends (they took up a collection!) and another was actually arranged by his mother.  The latter was a very cool lady; we talked on the phone for quite a while so she could feel me out, and when she was satisfied that I was the right woman for the job she tasked me to show her son how to make love because she wanted him to know the right way before he inflicted himself on coeds.  What made the date even more interesting, however, was that the boy wasn’t a virgin after all; he just didn’t want to hurt his mother’s feelings by telling her after she had gone through all the trouble to carefully select and interview an escort!  It turned out Mama had nothing to worry about; he did at least as well as the average man, which was really my experience with most virgins.  It was certainly the case with a young Indian man in his late twenties who had come to America to make his fortune and was about to send for his bride; he wanted to be sure he knew what he was doing so he could make her happy in bed.  And though he asked me to critique his performance, I could find nothing to complain about.

Indeed, this sort of thing happened so consistently with virgins I sometimes wondered if most men don’t start out with good instincts and then tend to lose them over time.  Perhaps as some men gain experience and confidence they start taking for granted that they know what they’re doing, or perhaps they fall into bad habits that none of their lovers bother to correct.  Some men may just be so selfish that once the initial novelty wears off, they just don’t care about what women (especially not paid women) might like, and others may be so mired in the masculine “never ask for directions” thing that they try to teach themselves (by reading books or watching porn or whatever) and end up firmly convinced of their own expertise no matter how wrong they are.  I’ll bet a lot of them even learn from other virgins, and when the blind lead the blind the outcome is not likely to be a good one.  Maybe the parents who hired me for their sons understood that; in the absence of an older girlfriend to learn from, perhaps for a young man to enjoy his first time with a caring and patient harlot isn’t at all a bad idea.

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Backward, Turn Backward

Posted in Current Events, Perception, Tyranny, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 15, 2011| 25 Comments »

The prostitute is not, as feminists claim, the victim of men but rather their conqueror, an outlaw who controls the sexual channel between nature and culture. –  Camille Paglia

Ignorance of a subject never stops fools from opining about it, but when the subject is prostitution the ignoramuses aren’t just wrong; they tend to actually turn the facts backward and upside-down, then proclaim their own ignorance to be knowledge and brand the knowledge of the real experts, the whores themselves, as propaganda.  In the looking-glass world of the prohibitionists the real is unreal and vice versa; common situations are called “rare” and rare ones an “epidemic”, an independent businesswoman is a “victim”, a female-dominated profession is characterized as “exploitation of women”, ignorance is strength and freedom is slavery.  To be sure, this isn’t a new problem; insecure men have been claiming their own lust is “really” female lust for at least three or four millennia.  But the sick, twisted weltanschauung of neofeminists, born as it is out of their own wounded, frightened psyches, has found an ally in the fragile, infantile ego of the male politician and this marriage made in Hell has given rise to an anti-whore catechism which makes the myth of the wanton seem positively reasonable in comparison.

Brandy Devereaux recently brought a perfect example of this to my attention; in this article from Statesman.com political grandstanding and lies are called “remarkable”, financial independence is called “economic dependence”, social networks are called “isolation”, work is referred to as “being purchased”, the majority is called a minority and vice-versa, firsthand accounts are called “myth” and making one’s own choices is called “demeaning servitude”.  The neofeminist author of this article refers to women as “objects” and proclaims laws which characterize adult women as incompetent minors to be a “giant step forward”.  But see for yourself:

One recent morning two Georgia lawmakers did a remarkable thing…speak up for teenage prostitutes.  Girls are manipulated and violated, held captive through violence, isolation, threats, economic dependence and emotional abuse, said…Edward Lindsey…”Right now there are hundreds of girls all across Atlanta and this region who are waiting in hotel rooms to be purchased by men on the Internet,” said state Rep. Buzz Brockway…Maybe there are some happy hookers, but they are a comparative few within a sea of misery that their outsized myth helps create.  If you meet such a person, ask her how she started out in the business and how old she was.  Increasingly, the prostitute is now understood to be a trafficked object, a slave to a pimp, a victim trapped in demeaning, dangerous servitude…

With so many conflicting views, it can be difficult to write laws to help people brutalized by those who buy and sell them.  If she’s a victim, she should be protected.  If she’s a criminal, she should be prosecuted.  In grappling with such conflicts, states across the country have been rewriting laws to make it tougher on traffickers, pimps and johns and easier on those they prostitute…The Georgia House recently passed some of the most progressive legislation in the country on the subject.  The vote was 168-1, and when it passed the lawmakers broke into applause.  For traffickers, pimps and johns, the bill imposes higher fines and longer sentences, which get even longer if their victims are young.  There would be a 25-year minimum prison sentence for using coercion to traffic someone under 18.  Buying sex with a 16-year-old would bring a sentence of at least 5 years.  Younger than that and it’s a 10-year minimum.  At least as important, the bill would make it harder for the sellers and buyers of sex to defend themselves.  Didn’t know her age?  Wouldn’t matter…

On this issue, people usually on opposite sides came together:  religious groups and feminists, Republicans and Democrats.  The new Republican attorney general, Sam Olens, contributed ideas he picked up from the National Association of Attorneys General.  Prosecutors worked on the bill with a group called A Future Not a Past, which aims at ending the prostitution of girls.  Georgia Women for a Change suggested approaches from national anti-trafficking organizations.  A Baptist group that last year opposed a bill that would have banned prosecuting underage prostitutes supported this one…

I’m sure I’m not alone in recognizing the Swedish reek on all this; as I predicted last year, it’s rapidly becoming more popular because it lets sex-haters of both types, the neofeminist and Puritan, infantilize prostitutes and attack our livelihood while claiming to “help” us.  Note the implication that all prostitutes start as teenagers (a myth I busted back on November 27th)  and mention of the organization “A Future Not a Past”, which commissioned the bogus Schapiro Group “study” I analyzed two days later.  As for the Georgia law touted in this mirrored manifesto, I pointed out the potential for abuse inherent in it on February 19th.  I’m not surprised the legislators broke into applause; they had succeeded in getting widespread support from the sheeple for an expansion of government’s power to enrich itself by accusing citizens of vague, unprovable and poorly-defined crimes.  While most of the rest of the world moves toward greater liberty and increased choices for women, we in the “Land of the Free” are allowing our leaders to steadily row this country backward into the Dark Ages.

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Fictional Interlude: Spring Forward

Posted in Fiction, Miscellaneous, tagged , , , , on March 13, 2011| 11 Comments »

This story is unusual in that it’s a rewrite of one I first penned around 1989, which was lost when the paper copy vanished and the floppy disc on which it was kept was somehow damaged.  I’ve never forgotten it, though, and a few weeks ago I realized it would be perfect for this month’s fictional interlude so I simply rewrote it (IMHO somewhat better than before).  It’s also unusual in another way:  Up to now the whores in these tales, whether protagonist or antagonist, have largely been on the side of the angels; but as you will soon see this one is definitely an exception!  If you’re a new reader and like this story you might also enjoy the others linked here.

Demons are moody, treacherous beings; the spells designed to summon them are full of complex instructions and peculiar requirements, and violation of any of these may break the magical constraints placed upon the entity and allow it to exact a horrible vengeance upon the mortal foolish enough to drag it from its own plane of existence in an attempt to force it into servitude.  And given his comparative inexperience at black magic, Howard wasn’t about to risk any of the more complicated rituals; he was too squeamish for blood sacrifice, too shaky-handed to inscribe intricate cabalistic diagrams, and too poor at math to trust his calculation of precise astrological conditions, and he wasn’t knowledgeable enough to be sure what the various archaic names for certain herbs and powders might actually refer to in modern terminology.  But the grimoire he had stolen from an estate he was cataloging for the bank was large and very complete, and his thorough study of it eventually turned up half a dozen spells in which even a novice like himself could feel a reasonable degree of confidence.

He read the descriptions of the specific demons conjured by these more accessible invocations and quickly settled upon the one which appealed most to him:  Nahemah, the Princess of Succubae, fallen angel of prostitution and harlot of Hell, who conferred upon he who could command her the gifts of divination and sexual power over any mortal.  Considering Howard’s meager assets and dismal track record with the opposite sex, this was the demon for him; with divination he could pick winning stocks or horses, and with power over women he could enslave the proud whores who were only interested in him for as long as he could keep paying.  He would show them, and other women too; in fact everyone who had ever crossed him would rue the day they had done so once Nahemah was his to command!  Best of all, her spell wasn’t even difficult; the only critical stipulation was that the final word be pronounced exactly at midnight.

The next day he paid no mind to the lovely spring weather as he drove around town collecting everything he needed for the procedure, and for the rest of the afternoon he devoted himself to laying out his supplies and moving all the furniture to the sides of his living room, then carefully inscribing the protective pentacle on the floor in chalk.  He made sure he measured every dimension carefully and precisely copied the arcane words of protection around its rim, then studied the ritual again and practiced pronouncing those Latin words of its text with which he was unfamiliar.  He confined his dog in the garage so as to preclude any possibility of her smudging the lines of the diagram and then tested the amount of time it would take him to perform the whole summoning, determining after several trial runs that he should start at 11:30 and pace himself with frequent pauses at junctures where they seemed to be allowed so as to be ready to complete the last phrase as his hall-clock was striking twelve.  He then checked that clock and his others against the official time announcement, then prepared a generous supper and after eating allowed himself the rare indulgence of a cigar.  “I’ll be able to afford these whenever I like once I strike my bargain with Nahemah,” he thought, “and a different girl fixing my dinner every night!”  His thoughts soon wandered to other pleasures he would enjoy with those women, but he dismissed such fantasies as distracting to his concentration; there would be plenty of time for that later, only it wouldn’t be mere fantasy then!

By 11 PM his nerves were thoroughly frazzled and he had a glass of wine to calm them.  He only allowed himself the one; after all this work and preparation he wasn’t about to risk his success on slurred speech.  In over four decades he had never succeeded at anything worthwhile, and he certainly wasn’t going to do anything to risk failure tonight!  So he composed himself as best he could, and when he heard the half-hour chime he checked his clocks again, then lit the candles and began the ritual.

Howard’s spirits began to rise as he realized that this time he had done everything right; he neither stumbled over the words nor fumbled over the gestures, and the pacing was exactly as he had practiced. Some fifteen minutes into the ceremony his dog began to howl mournfully from the garage; perhaps her keen senses had detected some disturbance in the environment caused by the spell’s beginning to work. Then as if in imitation of the dog, the wind outside also began to howl, but he ignored both it and the animal; with his victory so close he could not admit even the slightest distraction.  He paused momentarily in his incantation while gesturing and burning a piece of rune-marked parchment, then stole a glance at his watch and began the final phrases of the conjuration, ending just as his clock began to strike twelve.

He did not have long to wait after that; a column of multicolored smoke erupted within the summoning diagram inscribed on the floor and the room was filled with a sweet, complex odor with earthy undertones.  Within the vapor a shadowy form appeared, and as the cloud began to dissipate the shape was revealed as that of a hauntingly beautiful woman whose unearthly nature was only betrayed by the fact that her eyes were lightless orbs like two enormous black pearls.  The dog’s howling was frantic now, and the wind had risen to a gale, and as Nahemah looked upon him with a terrible smile he somehow knew deep in his gut that something was very, very wrong.

“I will never understand mortals,” she purred in a voice as sweet as honey and as cold as the void between worlds.  “I enjoy coming to your plane so much that I placed as few restrictions on my summoning as possible, yet you blithely ignored my simple requirement and called me hither a full hour before the permitted time.  ‘Tis a pity; it would have been far more entertaining to trick you into betraying yourself.”  And with that she stepped forward out of the circle, its power broken by the miscast spell, and her would-be master’s scream was abruptly silenced as the two of them vanished like a nightmare on wakening.  Poor, incompetent Howard; though he had done his very best to get everything right, it never occurred to him than no mortal government has the power to compel a demon to observe Daylight Savings Time.

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He Said, She Said

Posted in Current Events, Perception, The Dark Side, tagged , , , , , , , , , , on March 4, 2011| 10 Comments »

All fantasy should have a solid base in reality. –  Max Beerbohm

As I’ve discussed before, BDSM is an exercise in trust, and not merely of the submissive for the dominant; in noncommercial male-dominant situations he must also trust her not to turn on him and misrepresent the situation to disapproving and ignorant “authorities” who will then accuse him of rape, torture and worse.  I examined one such case on October 27th, and in recent weeks another appeared; here’s how it was reported on February 15th in the Huffington Post:

A Wisconsin woman looking for New York City housing on Craigslist made an agreement with a 45-year-old man living in Brooklyn:  She’d cook and clean in exchange for free rent. But when she arrived this month, she told police, she was handcuffed to a radiator and made to be the man’s sex slave for eight days, acknowledging she left the apartment at least once and returned.

The man, John Hopkins, has been charged with rape, assault and unlawful imprisonment and was being held on $350,000 bail…Officers found the 27-year-old woman Saturday in the studio apartment in the fetal position, shaking, on the bed.  A rope was bolted near the bed where he tied her to rape her, she said.  Handcuffs she said were used to shackle her to the radiator were found nearby.  By the bed, officers found a bag with a ball-gag, whip and a rope.  The woman was taken to a hospital with rectal hemorrhaging and bruising.  Authorities withheld her name because of the nature of her complaint.

Authorities were called to the apartment Saturday after the woman’s mother contacted authorities in Wisconsin.  The woman apparently had broken free that day and contacted her mother, saying she was going to kill herself because she couldn’t bear to be locked up anymore, police said.  It’s not clear why she didn’t call 911 herself.  Police arrived and found both the man and woman in the apartment.

The woman told police she met Hopkins online, and he bought her a one-way ticket to New York City on February 4th.  He met her at the airport, and the two took a taxi to his apartment…Once inside…he told her she was going to be his slave.  Hopkins forced her to call him “master” and let her leave only to go to work, the documents said.  She had a job as a chef at a restaurant on Manhattan’s Upper East Side, and she left at least once but for some reason returned, authorities said, though it’s not clear why.  When she did, she was handcuffed again.  During the eight days, she was blindfolded, gagged and repeatedly raped and forced to perform oral sex, according to court documents.

It’s clear there is an awful lot of information missing from the story as presented; the most obvious problem is the seemingly contradictory statements about her comings and goings.  At one point it says she “left at least once and returned”, but it also says Hopkins “only let her leave to go to work”…did she call her mother on the first day of work, or had she been in and out before?  She clearly couldn’t keep a job just reporting to work once in eight days.  And if she wanted to escape badly enough to call her mother for help, why on Earth did she go back to the apartment instead of simply waiting at the restaurant?  I immediately suspected that Hopkins and the woman had an online BDSM relationship and he eventually talked her into coming to New York to live it for real, but when she got there she discovered it was a case of “good fantasy, bad reality”.

Hopkins’ version appeared in the New York Daily News five days later:

John Hopkins said he has one question for the…woman who has accused him of rape:  “Why did you do this to me?”… Hopkins…recalled responding to the ad his accuser posted on Craigslist two years ago looking for sex…[and] said they started to meet up for role-play sex sessions that involved him tying her up as the “slave” while he acted as “master.”  “I didn’t rape her,” insisted Hopkins, who works as an audio engineer.  “Everything we did was role-playing.  In the game of role-play, the ‘slave’ actually has the power.”

Hopkins…faces a first-degree rape charge and a litany of other charges…Hopkins said that [the woman’s] account is a lie.  “Everything they’re saying I did was consensual,” Hopkins said.  “She could have left if she wanted to, but she didn’t.”  Hopkins said his kinky sex games with the 27-year-old Midwest woman continued until a few weeks ago when she started drinking heavily.  She left his home, was then kicked out of her friend’s apartment on the upper West Side and claimed she crashed in Central Park one night, where she was attacked…”I’m convinced those are where the scratches came from,” he said.  “I didn’t do any of that.”

Hopkins said the woman returned to his place Friday where she downed half a bottle of vodka.  He said he phoned her mother to tell her the situation and she spoke to her daughter, a sushi chef, for half an hour.  When they hung up, her mother then called the cops and Hopkins was swiftly arrested, Hopkins said.  “I got railroaded,” he said.  “A woman says anything happened to them in New York State, and they believe her and not the man.  It’s not fair.”

Note the scare quotes around the word “consensual” in the headline, indicating the authors’ total ignorance of BDSM (they obviously don’t believe a woman could ever consent to it despite the fact that a great many do); also note that though the first story was plastered all over the media the follow-up got almost no press at all.  IMHO Hopkins’ story, though it has a few iffy elements, holds more water; except for the duration it’s pretty much what I had already guessed.  But it should be relatively easy to determine which story is true; if the woman only arrived in the city eight days ago on a one-way airline ticket as she claims, there will be a record of it.  Also, though Craigslist deletes old ads someone may be able to dig up a cached copy of the index showing the apartment ad the woman claims to have answered (like Gawker did for Chris Lee’s ad, as reported in Wednesday’s column).  Was she drunk when the police arrived as Hopkins claims, and what about the friend she supposedly stayed with one night?  And then, as reported in The Gothamist, there are the emails:

Hopkins’ attorney Andrew Stoll said the pair did not meet on Craiglist and, “All of the acts in question were consensual acts between two adults who freely agreed to every aspect of their relationship.”  He showed emails the woman allegedly sent to Hopkins, including one from during the alleged imprisonment, “i yearn to serve my Master better.  can i cook for you tomarrow?  i love you so much.”  Stoll said, “These accusations only arose when my client called the complainant’s mother, to tell her that her daughter needed some emotional help, and should probably go back home.”

What a sad, sorry mess.  One of the two is lying and the one telling the truth is a fool.  If the woman isn’t lying she was a damned fool to fly across the country to move in with a complete stranger in New York, and if Hopkins isn’t lying he was a damned fool to continue a BDSM relationship with a woman he knew was emotionally unstable (though the cops didn’t find her restrained there was evidence of rough anal sex).  Due to the current semi-legal status of BDSM it’s possible for a monster like the one who captured Jill Brenneman to pass a nonconsensual relationship off as consensual, and in other cases for disturbed women to represent consensual relationships as nonconsensual (as Hopkins alleges happened in his case).  Until the right of consenting adults to do as they please in private is recognized, confusion and hysteria take the place of rational analysis and situations are more likely to be interpreted as the observers want to see them rather than as they actually happened.

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Thinking with the Wrong Head

Posted in Current Events, Miscellaneous, tagged , , , , , , , , on March 2, 2011| 58 Comments »

A fool too late bewares when all the peril is past. –  Queen Elizabeth I

It seems that politicians just can’t help making asses of themselves; yesterday I discussed three such cases who probably still don’t realize how stupid they look to rational people, but today we’ll look at one who destroyed his reputation and his political career through actions which appear to display a complete inability to foresee the totally foreseeable.  Of course, that would presume than Congressman Chris Lee was thinking with the big head rather than the little one, which he obviously wasn’t.  Here’s the story, condensed and paraphrased from one which appeared on Gawker last Friday (February 25th):

Three hours after Gawker’s February 9th publication of a photo of Chris Lee standing in the mirror shirtless, along with the story of the married Republican congressman from New York’s attempt to pick up a woman via the Craigslist personals, he had resigned.  His sudden exit took many people by surprise, but apparently Lee’s rapid retreat may have been intended to cover up something more scandalous:  two D.C.-area transgender women contacted Gawker, each with a separate story about exchanging emails with Lee.  One produced an ad that Lee allegedly posted on Craigslist in search of trans women; the other sent us a never-before-seen photo that she says Lee sent her after they started chatting by email.

The first report came from a pre-op transgender woman from Arlington, Virginia whom Gawker called “Fiona”; she said she had replied to a “casual encounters” ad on Craigslist in mid-January and used the “e-mail this posting to a friend” function to send a copy to herself:

Sexy Classy guy for passable TS/CD – m4t – 39 (Cap Hill)
Date: 2011-01-14, 8:55PM EST

New to area. Very fit classy, successful guy. 39, 6ft 190lbs, blond/blue. smooth hard body. Looking for a sexy ts/cd that i can spoil. I promise not to disappoint.

Craigslist personals are removed within seven days of posting, but since Google caches Craigslist index pages Gawker was able to confirm that an ad with precisely the same headline was posted on the evening of January 14.  The headline and ad itself are similar to the previously-revealed flirtation, such as the words “fit” and “classy”, and dates to the same evening; it also featured the same shirtless Blackberry picture, though cropped to hide Lee’s face.  Yes, that’s right:  a member of Congress posted a personal ad seeking transsexuals and crossdressers and even included a picture of himself, all without thinking twice, apparently.  Like the woman in the first incident Fiona is 34 and black, and she discovered his identity in the same way the first woman did:  “I copied and pasted his email into Facebook, and that’s when his picture of him and his wife and his little boy showed up.  Then I clicked on the link and realized he was a politician from New York, and I was like OMG.”  She emailed him a few more times before telling him in an email on January 21 that she knew who he really was, and he never replied.  But that same day, Lee sent an email to his staff saying that his Gmail account may have been hacked.

The second report came from a transvestite prostitute Gawker called “Holly”, whose Craigslist ad Lee allegedly answered.  “Holly” demanded money from the site for email transcripts, but did provide a new picture before backing out of the deal.  This photo clearly resembles Lee; the man in the photo has the same physique, is standing in the same pose and is holding the same red Blackberry, although the photo was clearly taken in a different setting and he’s wearing different pants.

Lee has not yet spoken publicly about the incident, except to say in his letter of resignation that he made “profound mistakes” and “regret[s] the harm that my actions have caused my family, my staff and my constituents.”  But if Lee was using the Internet to meet up with transsexuals and cross-dressers his rapid resignation makes sense; he may have thought if he quit immediately he could avoid having his kink exposed.

Lots of politicians hire prostitutes, and lots of them have a queer streak, but most of them have the sense to hire professionals from a discreet, upscale agency rather than trolling Craigslist or, even worse, placing their own ads to attract liaisons!  But Lee didn’t stop there; no, he used his regular email address instead of setting up another one for his “hobby”, and then he sent real pictures showing his face not merely to one person but to at least three!  It’s impossible to pass this off as a momentary lapse of reason; his actions delineate a clear pattern which every experienced whore should recognize.  As I’ve discussed before, men tend to get very weird when they’re sexually frustrated; their fantasies get steadily kinkier and they are wont to take bigger and bigger risks to fulfill them as control over their actions shifts from the top of the torso to the bottom.  Most public figures have the sense to hire discreet professionals long before reaching the point of total loss of judgment, but obviously Lee did not and the results aren’t pretty.  I don’t feel sorry for any politician’s self-made messes, but I do pity his wife and the people of his congressional district whom he hurt with his spectacularly poor judgment.  Perhaps if our society were to grow up enough to stop persecuting harlots, men like Chris Lee would find it easier to deal with sexual tension before it causes a very messy public scandal.

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