Posts Tagged ‘animals’

Shut your mouth, boy.  –  “Officer” Hoover

As I was poking around YouTube, I discovered this live performance of Part One of Tubular Bells, which is not only seasonal (the first movement was used as the theme to The Exorcist, after all), but also happens to be one of my favorite albums of all time (and if you’ve ever seen me professionally, you may have noticed it playing in session).  The links above it were provided by Cop Crisis (x3), Scott Hechinger (x2), and Radley Balko, in that order.

From the Archives

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Diary #588

Cicero is now officially a biggie piggie; as of last Friday he lives outside full-time.  I had planned on October 1st as the date for some time, then in the last few days of September he confirmed that decision by figuring out how to get out of his pen in the morning whether we let him out or not.  He’s up to about 60#, and we’ve been letting him run around outside from early in the morning until about dinnertime for the past month anyhow; the only thing that’s changed is he gets his dinner outside now and sleeps where he likes, which seems to mostly be up on the bathhouse deck or on the dog’s bed in the shop.  He didn’t even cry or try to get inside the first night, and let me tell you, I find him a lot cuter now that I don’t have to clean up after him twice a day.  He likes to follow us around like a puppy; this was taken from inside the chicken yard, because he tends to follow me there when I go to feed them, and will circle the outside trying to figure out how to get in to eat their scratch corn.  Other times he forages near Shiloh and Jonathan out in the paddock, or hangs out with them in the barn.  He also likes to nap on the deck near the hot tub when it’s running; I reckon he likes the sound of the water.  All in all he seems a happy, contented animal, and the transition to outside couldn’t have been smoother.

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This bitch is lying. She’s high on something.  –  a cop’s medical expertise

This song brings back some very special memories for me, especially during October, but I recently realized I had never featured it here.  The links above it were provided by Yasmin Nair, Franklin Harris, Wendy Lyon, Radley Balko, Cop Crisis, and Desiree Alliance, in that order.

From the Archives

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Diary #585

It’s harvest time again, and that means processing fruit!  The heat wave stunted our blackberries and plums, so I only got enough of the former for a few bowls of berries with cream, and enough of the latter to make a plum cobbler and two jars of jam.  But the fruit we did get of both was wonderfully juicy and sweet.  The apples, on the other hand, appear to have done quite well; last week Chekhov gathered a whole cart full of them, and after I culled out the bad ones I still had enough that, after coring, filled the three big bowls you see here plus one of my extra-large stock pots.  After pulping it all fit into the three bowls, and I was able to press about 6 liters of juice from all that.  So I’ve got a carboy fermenting into cider in the dark, cool, under-stair cupboard, and two mason jars of fresh juice in the fridge (well, one now, because the fresh stuff is so much better than store-bought apple juice it’s almost like a different thing).  There are still plenty of apples on the trees, so I plan to keep gathering and pressing until there aren’t, and I hope to get at least two more carboys of cider plus enough to make four to six jars of apple butter; I hadn’t made it before last year, and it came out so well I kicked myself for only doing two jars.  After pressing, we mix the resulting pomace into the feed for Shiloh and Jonathan, but as you can see, Cicero prefers his fresh (and seems quite happy with cores).

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Financial Times omits any mention of the nature of [the] groups…[who] inten[d] to “eradicate” an entire legal industry.  –  Gustavo Turner

Follow Your Bliss

Understand that people like this are the norm in policing sexual offenses, and always will be:

An FBI agent who investigated sex crimes against children has been arrested and charged with multiple sex crimes against children across several states…David Harris [got himself] tasked with investigating crimes against children, including child pornography…[so it’s no surprise that] in February…he…expos[ed] himself to a 14-year-old girl…while on vacation in [Florida]…but…the…investigation…led to other [sex] crimes committed by Harris [against both] minors and adults in…Louisiana and Texas…[snooping in Harris’ phone revealed] conversation[s in which he admitted]…his sexual preference [for] underage [girls] and [bragging about] his exploits…Harris was arrested earlier this summer in Ascension Parish [Louisiana] and…has outstanding arrests warrants…from East Baton Rouge and Orleans Parish[es and] Tyler, Texas…

Traffic Jam (#403)

By this standard of “evidence”, Johnny Cash is lucky he was never accused of murder:

A jury found Defendant, Jaimian Sims, guilty of sex trafficking a minor and…the…court imposed a life sentence.  Sims appeals…arguing [among other things] … that certain rap videos were improperly admitted into evidence and shown to the jury…He contends that the lyrics…were fictional and did not depict his real life…Although these videos speak only generally to the pimping lifestyle and are cumulative of testimony in that respect, the violence and weapons depicted in the videos are relevant to the force charge—that Sims sex trafficked by force, fraud, or coercion…[the judges declared they we]re satisfied that the videos were not harmful to the defense…

License to Rape (#652)

Prohibition turns the body of every citizen into a “crime scene”, which can be violated by cops at will:

State officials say a new grant will be used to provide training for Georgia law enforcement officers to draw blood from drivers [without their consent so as to]…prosecut[e them for] DUI…

If you’re not horrified by the prospect of psychopathic thugs running around with permission to jam needles into people’s bodies without their consent on the side of the road, you must be new to this blog.

The Puritan Recrudescence (#799)

Expect the equation of human sexuality with pollution to become more common:

The editorial board of the Financial Times — arguably the world’s most influential news source for the banking, investment and overall finance industries — published an editorial…[which] compares sex work and adult content to…environmental pollutants, and parrots sensationalist pieces by The New York Times and the BBC alleging a non-existent “proliferation” of illegal content on adult sites…The subhead…soberly warns its readers…that working with the porn industry “can pose legal as well as reputational risks”…It’s the old circular argument favored by censors, prudes and well-paid religious anti-porn activists: reputable banks should not do business with sex workers or porn because they have been known to look for alternative forms of financing — which sex workers and porn are forced to resort to because reputable banks won’t do business with them…“The argument for banks to stay away from porn is, if anything, stronger than staying away from coal,” is the Financial Times’ take on that dubious comparison…

Scapegoats (#930)

It’s fascinating how the State has changed the excuse for these laws from “morality” to “animal abuse”:

[Typical and representative cop] Terry Yetman…was charged with multiple counts of sexual abuse of animals…including filming sex with his own police K9.  This decorated cop was also charged with 31 counts of child pornography several months later.  Now, nearly 3 years after his initial arrest…Yetman — despite facing over 70 charges — pleaded guilty to just one count of possession of child pornography and five counts of sexual abuse of an animal…He faces a total of 45 years in prison and mandatory registration as a sex offender…

Rough Trade (#1043) 

Gee, I wonder why this happens so often in Ireland?

A Dublin man [who] attack[ed] and violently h[eld] three women in his home against their will during separate incidents has been denied bail.  Aaron Barwell…[attacked] three [different]…escorts…on 29 January, 13 August and [27 August].  He is also accused of making threats to kill or cause serious harm to two of the women…[Barwell apparently believed that claiming] the third incident was prompted by a theft of cocaine, and the others arose after [he refused to] pay…[the escorts would somehow get the judge to grant him bail]…

A Moral Cancer (#1157)

Though the claim that certain foods can take “time off one’s life” is not new, I’ve never one this absurdly specific:

…[Nutritionists] at the University of Michigan…created a Health Nutritional Index which [claims to quantify] the nutritional impact…of almost 6,000 foods and calculated the health burden of each one.  Their findings [predictably singled out popular, pleasant foods, claiming] that every hot dog a person eats takes…36 minutes off their healthy life expectancy.  Soft drinks…shortened life by 12 minutes, bacon by six minutes…each double cheeseburger…nine minutes….[and] each portion of cheese…a minute off [the un]healthy [end of] life…the index also [claims] that it’s equally possible to [magically]  add minutes…each banana was [claimed] to add 13 and a half minutes…as was a portion of baked salmon…a peanut butter and jelly sandwich…[supposedly] adds a whopping 33 minutes to life…

The puritanical notion that lifelong deprivation of pleasure in the vague hope of adding a few extra minutes of senility and decreptitude to the far end of one’s old age – a time one has only a 50% chance of reaching in the first place, statistically – is so alien to my way of thinking, I’ve never been able to wrap my head around it, even as a concept for consideration.

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Diary #584

One of the really nice things about living on the Pacific side of the Olympic peninsula is that it’s nearly always cooler than the rest of the state, except in winter (when it’s usually milder).  In Oklahoma, there was about a 50oC range between typical summer highs and typical winter lows; at Sunset, the range is only about 30oC.  During that awful heat wave at the end of June, we were a few degrees cooler than Seattle and were out of it almost two days earlier, and when I drive home it’s not unusual to feel perfectly comfortable in shirtsleeves in Seattle, only to feel distinctly chilly when I get out of the car at Sunset.  And virtually as soon as the Dog Days were over two weeks ago, the temperature dropped so much I closed my office window, which has been open since early June.  At the moment I’m writing this, my weather app shows a 6oC difference between Seattle and Sunset, and that’s not especially unusual.  So it’s beginning to feel a bit autumnal here already, and a few days ago I actually wore a sweater one day; in two more weeks the autumn will arrive in earnest, and not a day too soon for me.

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Please, don’t kill me!  –  Angelo Quinto, last words

Since Don Everly died last week, I thought this was the most appropriate song with which to memorialize him.  The links above it were provided by Lenore Skenazy (“ball”), Dave Krueger (“Hall”), Jesse Walker (“Everly”), and Cop Crisis (everything else).

From the Archives

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I can’t breathe!  –  Nekia Trigg

This one’s been going through my head since I selected the illustration for my July 4th column, so here it is.  The links above it were provided by Franklin Harris, Clarissa, Cop Crisis, Radley Balko, The Onion, Stephen Lemons, and Popehat, in that order.

From the Archives

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Diary #580

Everybody knows that pigs are messy, and most people know they’re very intelligent by quadruped standards.  But do you know how strong these suckers are?  Don’t be fooled by the fat; those dirigible-with-legs shapes are mostly muscle, and since they’re rooters their heads, necks and faces are just as strong as the rest of them.  So when a piglet decides he wants out of his pen, you know what he does?  He sticks his snout under the edge and lifts.  Cicero isn’t big enough yet to just lift it clean, but he’s more than big enough to push it that way.  So if he’s out on the deck and nobody’s in sight and he wants to go inside (where his little piggy brain tells him the food is), he’ll repeatedly bump his cage over and over until he gets to the ramp, then scuttle under the edge, run around to the front door, come up the front ramp and start oinking outside the glass doors.  And this isn’t something he’s done only a couple of times, oh no; it happens about twice a week on average.  Since it’s obvious he knows where home is, and he’s getting bigger all the time, it won’t be much longer before we start letting him run free, and I’m looking forward to that; though I love Grace and I don’t really resent having to clean up after a piglet twice a day, I’d just as soon use the time and effort to do something else, thankyouverymuch.

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